My heart is breaking these days for a dear friend of mine whose marriage of many years is ending. It came as a complete and total shock to her a couple of weeks ago when her husband announced that he no longer wanted to be married. My friend had no clue it was even on the horizon because, as far as she knew, everything was great between them. There had been no warning signs, no off-handed comments made, nothing. He just came to her and told her he needed out and was leaving her.
Any marriage break-up is difficult but when it's not mutual and one party didn't see the breakup coming it's heart wrenching. I feel just awful for her and their children. As much support as my friend needs she'll still try to be strong for the kids; they must be just as confused, saddened and scared as their mom is. I'm sure none of them really understands anything that's going on right now.
What breaks my heart most is that my friend is one of the kindest and most giving people I've ever known and it doesn't make any sense to me that something like this has to happen to her. It just doesn't seem fair. I know, life isn't fair but why does such a great person, who's already had a great deal of difficulties in her life, have to be saddled with even more grief and heartache?
She's a strong girl and I'm absolutely positive that she and her kids will get through this with all the strength and dignity they can muster. It'll be hard and there will be bumps in the road along the way but, in the end, she will come out so much stronger and wiser and her kids will follow suit. I have no doubt. Please send prayers and positive energy to her and her kids through this ordeal. I'm sure they can use every bit of it and I'd appreciate it.
I am so truly sorry for you all, my dear friend. Please know that, even though I'm miles away, I am here and will do whatever I can for you. You can call me to talk, to cry, to vent, to scream, or whatever else you may think of. You have the strength and support of your family and friends behind you and I know that we'll all be with you every step of the way. I'll do my best to remain strong for you but I can't promise that I won't cry with you at some point as I'm doing as I write this. Just know that I love you with all my heart and wish only the best for you and the kids. Whenever you're ready, you've got my number. In the meantime, I'll be thinking of you. <3 font="">
Until next time...peace to all.
Tomorrow starts another year of school for the kids and I can't wait. The kids are excited about going back and we've already had Zach's and Dolly's back-to-school nights - last night, Monday. Ty's is Thursday night, I'm guessing because it's the only time the school could fit it in. Dolly likes her new teacher, Ty just likes school and is excited about the whole prospect of it and Zach, while excited, is a bit nervous. He's going to the same school as Ty is this year and doesn't have anyone in his class that was in his class last year. He'll do fine, though, he makes friends easily.
I'm really excited, though, because I'll get some quiet time and be able to work without all the background noise. It's been tough the past few weeks because Ursula has had a lot for me to do, hence a lot of research and phone calls. Talking to a supplier while silently stomping my foot or bang a table to get the kids' attention to shush them gets frustrating after a while. It's all good, though; I'll have all the time I need starting tomorrow.
We've got most of their school supplies, some are still needed, and they still need jeans, and Zach a pair of sneakers but they'll have to wait for the time being. Things haven't been going very well over here lately - lots of family issues to deal with. My ex was arrested last week for DV against his girlfriend and, for the second time, the kids' counselors called Children's Division on him and her. Now the State is involved big time and my ex doesn't seem to understand that it's not just for that one incident.
He's not allowed to see the kids at all right now and I have to file for sole custody and supervised visitation with the courts at the request of the caseworker. It's good for the kids because it'll give them a chance to work on their coping skills with their counselors and to heal a little bit before seeing him again. For the time being they all seem to have calmed down a bit but the missing school supplies are bugging Zach. I keep trying to tell him that he won't need them this first week and that he'll have everything by next week but he's not yet convinced. :)
I've had a lot of stress over it all because last week I was dealing with anxiety-ridden kids, the caseworker, my ex, and his now-ex-girlfriend on a daily basis for a few days straight. I even took some time Wednesday afternoon to lie in my bed and cry till there was nothing left. I was just so overwhelmed that I couldn't take it anymore. I'm a bit more on the positive side now and can just take everything one step at a time. And with the kids going back to school I'll have quiet time to actually thing everything through and do what needs to be done. I need that.
As things stand now, I've got three happy and excited kids who will all be back on a regulated schedule starting in the morning so they'll be a lot more settled; and I can work on me and all the things the caseworker wants me to do, as well as get Ursula's work done without a problem. Everything is starting to look up and I couldn't be more excited. Each day will bring a little more relief for all of us and, hopefully, within a couple of months, I'll have my family back to the way it was a few years ago. Thinking about it is enough to make me smile.
Until next time...peace to all.
