One Step Forward...Again

So, my ex got a job recently, working at a retail chain doing whatever. I don't know, I didn't ask, it's none of my business. When I told the kids he had a job one shrugged and the other two made comments to the effect of asking how long this job will last. They're really not happy with him and don't trust him at all; he's let them down way too many times. But I told them what I'm always being told, "He's trying." So they accepted it.

Maybe this time around he'll settle into the job and just do what he's supposed to without looking to run up the chain of command immediately. All the kids and I can do is hope for the best, same as we always do. But at least child support has started up again. I haven't gotten much of it yet because I had to apply for cash assistance back in August which I only needed for two months this time.

Since the state has already taken back what they gave to me I ought to start getting child support in full starting next week. That'll help since I'm behind on a lot of things right now and need to start catching up. At least the pressure is off me a little while I continue to look for work, which, I must say, is not all it's cracked up to be. I'm actually starting to take the rejection of no resume responses personally.

I found out from a former HR rep the reasons why I'm not getting any callbacks, and it doesn't seem right but I'll take her word for it. First, prospective employers look at my resume and can tell by the length of my work history that I'm not exactly young. They either figure that, at my age, I won't stick around very long, or that I won't want to work for minimum wage considering my extensive experience. Second, they know I'm not just out of school and getting my first job so I won't let it slide if I'm treated unfairly in the workplace. So rather than actually calling to speak with me they just toss my resume aside and move on to the next applicant.

I guess they're entitled to their opinions but it still seems wrong. I chose to stay at home when my kids were born to raise them and be there for them the way my mother wasn't for my sister and me. When I got divorced I worked from home as a tutor and then as an assistant so I could still be here for my kids when they needed me. Now it feels like I'm being punished for it. I haven't worked outside the home for 15 years so prospective employers don't think I'm a reliable risk. That's their loss, but no gain for me.

I'm still looking, though, and, in the meantime, I'll go back to volunteering for the schools the way I have in the past just so I can get out of the house for a few hours a week. If my ex holds on to this job I may be able to get back on top of things and won't still be in a hole when I finally do get a job. Everything always works out for me, though, so I'm going to count on that and just keep doing what I'm doing. I can't do any less.

Until next time...peace to all.