NtT - Day Two

Day two without nicotine is just about closed. I’m feeling fine physically, no chest pain or dizziness like I had last week when I tried to quit. That’s a plus, I guess. But I’m still not sleeping well. Last night I woke up at about 3:15 and lay in bed for a while before I fell back to sleep. I’m wondering if tonight will bring more frequent sleep disturbances. I really hope not, but I can’t stop it if it does happen.

I did pretty well with my eating today. I ate on schedule and I ate properly, no overindulging in the no-no foods. I also did my yoga this morning, and I was jogging on the rebounder this evening when one of the springs broke. I’d made it past the half-hour mark so I wasn’t too annoyed by it. Now, though, I have to find a place that sells rebounder replacement springs before I can continue. In the meantime I’ll have to find a different type of exercise to keep my metabolism going; something that will help to keep my stress level down and won’t irritate me. I get enough of that from everything else around me.

I’m trying to quit smoking, trying to lose weight, trying to get my kids back on track, and trying to get things lined up to move to the D.C. metro area this summer (which consists of lots of small elements). Other than the not smoking and weight loss issues, I’m basically waiting on others to respond to me before I can move forward. I know I can’t control what other people do but it doesn’t help my stress level when I can’t just jump in and help myself. I did some Mindfulness exercises today, and will try to meditate tonight just to clear my head and get myself realigned. It’s a must for me just so I don’t run out and buy a pack of cigarettes to cut the edginess I’m feeling. The fact that I’m bored isn’t helping much either.

Since the kids’ school schedules are staggered, I have no time during the day to work so I’m at home all day, every day, unless I have errands to run, of course. There are only so many times I can clean the house and only so much laundry I can do. If I try to read I fall asleep, the same happens when I watch television. I don’t have the patience for arts and crafts projects (not that I’m artistically inclined anyway), and I’m not going to do any baking; I don’t need it and the kids would only eat baked goods if I let them. Carrots, broccoli, what? What are they? I don’t know; I guess I’ll think of something to occupy my time. Suggestions would be appreciated.

For tonight, though, I’ll have to be content playing Scrabble on Pogo.com and just listening to the television in the background. It’s not even 10:00 yet so I can’t go to sleep. If I did and I actually slept through the night, I’d wake up around 4:00 a.m. That can’t happen. So, off I go to play a couple of video games and expand my mind learning new words I never knew existed. Until tomorrow…peace to all.