The Pay-It-Forward Fund

My friend Debi is a single mom of four kids; her sons are out on their own and her daughters live with her. For the past few years Debi has given house and home to other members of her family as well as friends who were going through rough times and had no place else to go. She never asked for anything from them while they lived with her because she knows what it's like to be in need since she's had a tough life herself.

Despite her many physical ailments Debi gave up her bedroom and her privacy to make room for these borders and has spent these years sleeping on the sofa, as uncomfortable as it was for her; and she used her meager income - money that barely supports herself and her daughters - to pay the increase in utilities and food costs that she incurred while she had these additional people living in her home.

She doesn't complain about it because it's something she chooses to do to help people who desperately needed the assistance. She just thinks that helping others is the right thing to do even when she doesn't have much to give. She's like me in that regard; I've been helped a lot over the past few years and I help others whenever I get the chance even if I don't have much to give. I'm not just referring to money; running errands, babysitting kids, a ride to an appointment, a night sitting at my house just to get out of their own, or even a 2:00am phone call because someone needs to talk. Every little bit helps and it's always appreciated.

Over the past month Debi has been in the process of moving. Due to circumstances beyond her control she can no longer stay in the house she's lived in for years and had to take whatever little savings she had to purchase a mobile home for her and her daughters. She also used some of it to purchase a used SUV because she didn't have a vehicle of her own and hasn't for years, again because of those same circumstances.

Right now she's trying to get her belongings moved into her new home but there are still numerous pieces of furniture she needs for her and her girls but she's low on funds. I've tried looking for places around the area she's in to see if I can find her some agencies like we have here in MO that will help single mothers get the things they need at little or no cost but I haven't found any yet. I know she'll get what she needs, I have no worries about that.

I'm telling you all of this for a reason, though. Debi emailed me today and told me a wonderful story that I just had to share. An acquaintance of Debi's, Sissy, a woman Debi has only met in person once, sent Debi a gift that made us both cry - it was a $200 gift card. Now that may not sound like much to you but to people like Debi and me it's a fortune. It was a wonderful surprise to Debi when she opened the package but at the same time she couldn't understand how Sissy, also a single mother with a meager income, could afford to send her such a gift. Surely Sissy didn't have that kind of money just lying around. How was she able to do it?

I'll tell you how. Sissy, who's had as a bad a life as both Debi and I have had, and her young son Dakota started a personal at-home fund a couple of years ago. They decided to take whatever loose change they collect throughout the year and put it in their individual piggy banks to create a Pay-It-Forward fund. At the end of the year they count up all their money and donate it to someone in need. Last year the money went toward food for the homeless; this year it went Debi and her daughters.

Sissy explained to Dakota that Debi is going through a rough time right now just like they'd gone through in the past. Dakota ran to his room, got his bank and said he wanted to donate the money to Debi this year. Sissy agreed so they dumped their piggy banks, counted the money, and purchased the gift card to be mailed to a friend in need. How awesome is that? Reading the story in Debi's email to me moved me to tears.

We hear about big companies donating money here or there all the time but we rarely hear of something like this; a mother and her son collecting change all year long to be able to help someone who really needs it when they themselves could probably use the money. It's amazing to me and it really restores my faith in people when I hear stories like this one. Unless you've been in situations like Debi, Sissy and I have you may not fully understand how such a gift can mean the world to someone.

Sissy and Dakota, you are two wonderfully special people to do what you do with your Pay-It-Forward fund and I wanted everyone to know about it. In a society where money and materialism seem to be at the forefront of everyone's lives you two have shown that you don't have to have a lot to be able to help another. Your generosity will come back to you in spades, no doubt.

Debi, you absolutely deserve this lovely gift. After all you've been through and done for others it's time for you and your girls to have a place of your own and for you to have some privacy in your own room. Sissy and Dakota's gift proves that. Enjoy it and know that everything will work itself out when it's supposed to and as it's supposed to be. I have no doubt there either.

It's not hard to do, folks, and it helps people who aren't in a position to help themselves right then. It doesn't matter how big or small the gesture, just know that whatever you do could help someone else in ways that you'll never know. Next time you do something for someone and they say, "Thanks, I owe you one," try responding with, "No need, please just pay it forward." Or the next time someone does something for you, pay it forward yourself; you'll be amazed at how good it makes you feel knowing you made someone's day. If you don't believe me, just ask Sissy and Dakota. :)

Until next time...peace to all.