Kid's Hopes Dashed By Lack of Common Courtesy

Whatever happened to common courtesy? Zach had a birthday on Tuesday - he turned 10 - and he wanted to invite a few kids from class to our house to celebrate with him. I told him that doing it on Tuesday would be a bad idea since he only gets off the bus at 4:00 and nobody would want to be bringing their kids over after school and just before dinner so I suggested that he invite them over for today, Saturday.

We had this conversation two weeks ago and he agreed with me so I dug out some invitations for him to take to school with him and give to the boys he wanted to invite. I told him what to put in each space - date, time, RSVP phone number, etc. He took them to school and was really excited to ask his favorite friends. Would you believe not one person RSVPd to the party?

I don't know what the deal is around here but in NY when you receive an invitation to a party you either accept or decline the invitation by the requested date. When we lived here the first time we tried sending invites to friends of the kids for their respective birthdays and the same thing happened. It's ridiculous because I have no idea how many to plan for if people don't tell me whether or not they'll be attending and it hurts the feelings of my kids.

Zach and I ran to the supermarket today to get some snacks and a giant cookie cake that he decided he wanted instead of a cheesecake. I also bought some frozen pizzas to bake and cut up so the kids would have something to eat. Oh, and we bought a tub of ice cream. We were all prepared and not one of the kids Zach invited showed up to help him celebrate his birthday. What the fuck is up with that?! It makes me sick, to say the least.

The only saving grace is that we already had the son of a friend spending the night, and two other boys, brothers, from across the cul-de-sac wanted to come over. So Zach had three friends here plus his brother and sister. They all played for a while outside while I made the pizza, they ate, played some more, and then had the cake and ice cream.

Zach appears to be happy with the day but I won't know for sure until it's all done and over with. He was really sad this morning when he told me not to buy anything because nobody was going to come anyway. That breaks my heart when my son has to deal with the fact that none of his school friends wanted to come over to celebrate with him. My kids go to every single party to which they're invited yet nobody ever comes to theirs. They didn't when we lived here the first time and they still don't.

I understand that kids around here are all involved in sports because their parents are sports fanatics but, seriously, to make a kid feel bad on his birthday because your kid's sporting event is so much more important is really unacceptable. There is no way to explain to a 10 year old that his friends can't come over yet again because they have to play their baseball, basketball, soccer game or that they have a practice. Kids don't understand that shit people!!! Especially Zachary. He's a great friend to everyone who knows him. Yes, he has his issues like any other kid but he doesn't deserve this.

He tends to take things personally. He's invited these kids over for play dates time and again yet they've always got something to do. I get apologies left and right from their parents, "Oh, I'm sorry. Todd has two baseball games this weekend," or "Mike has two practices and a game in the afternoon," or "Johnny will be gone for the weekend going hunting with his dad." Each of these answers is usually followed up with, "We'll definitely set another time for the boys to get together," but I never hear from any of the parents because they have their kids involved in so many fucking activities that the kids can't breathe. Let them be kids, for criminy's sake; stop trying to turn them into star athletes before they've even reached puberty.

Regardless of the activity going on at the time, there is absolutely no excuse to ignore a party invitation and the request for an RSVP. If you sent out invites and nobody called to let you know whether or not they were coming you'd be pissed. Well so am I. I'm pissed that you don't have the courtesy to respond and I'm pissed that you keep blowing my kid off for no good fucking reason whatsoever. When Zach decides that he doesn't want to hang out with your kid from now on you'll get to explain to your kid why and I hope you can make him understand that it's because his parents are dolts and that it's not his fault in any way. I'm betting you fail on that one because kids don't understand shit like this. Trust me, I know for a fact. I have to do deal with constantly.

Until next time...peace to all.