Goodbye, My Dear Friend

I met Ursula December 31, 2010. My kids and I had recently moved into Kara's basement apartment on Long Island, and I was looking for work. My friend Steve asked me if I wanted to make money on New Year's Eve working for Planet Party Planners. They had numerous venues to travel to that day to set up decorations for the evening parties. I couldn't pass up the opportunity for work so I jumped at the chance. Steve picked me up at about 4:30 in the morning and we went straight to Ursula and Mark's house to get started on the long day ahead of us.

Ursula greeted me as if she'd always known me and welcomed me into her home with open arms. She was cheerful and funny, and had a laugh that was contagious. We became friends immediately, and remained friends for the last five years. All we had in common was our sense of humor, our dedication to work, and our need to help others. Not minor things by any means but we were bonded by them.

When the kids and I moved from Kara's into the shelter, Ursula made sure I had a job working with her and Mark almost every day. She allowed me to arrange my hours so that I could work while the kids were in school and return to the shelter when the kids got home. She knew I was having a tough time, and she made sure that the kids and I were taken care of.

She and Mark made sure the kids had clothing and school supplies. They made sure the kids' holiday and birthday wishes were fulfilled. And they made sure that I had a solid support system and an income. Sometimes I was working in their home helping to create centerpieces, invitations, and whatever else needed to be done, and sometimes we were out at different venues setting up balloon bouquets or bowing chairs, whatever the event of the day required. They may not have actually needed the assistance, but they included me anyway.

Even after the kids and I left shelter and moved back to Missouri, Ursula made sure she had work for me to do from home. I spent days researching products to find the lowest prices, ordering stock items, contacting potential customers with information about our services, and whatever else Ursula could think of that would keep me busy enough to earn my pay. I loved her for that.

We spent many days going back and forth with text messages and/or phone calls getting items for upcoming parties and events, and we spent other days talking about our trials and tribulations that had nothing to do with work. Most recently we spent days talking about how she was feeling because the cancer she'd fought and beat years ago had returned. Over the past few months she spent her days having chemo treatments and radiation therapy, all to no avail.

Ursula ended up back in the hospital on March 8th due to complications, and on March 17th Mark was forced to put Ursula into hospice care because there was nothing more the doctors could do for her. I got to speak to her the following night when another friend, Leslie, visited Ursula and called me with her phone on speaker so she could hear what I was saying and tell me what Ursula was trying to respond. I told Ursula how much I appreciated all she'd done for the kids and me, and how much I loved her as a person and a friend. And I told her it was okay for her to go whenever she was ready, and that I'd never forget her. Ursula, through Leslie, told me that she loved the kids and me, too. That was the last time I spoke to her. On Wednesday March 23rd, my dear friend passed away with Mark by her side.

I will never forget you my dear friend. You were so caring and kind, and went above and beyond to help anyone who needed it, especially me and my bunch. Your laugh and smile are forever in my memory, and your beautiful voice plays constantly in my head. You were definitely one of a kind and I'm forever grateful to have known you. To quote your words back to you for all you've done, "Thank you, honey, you're the best." :)

Until next time...peace to all.