Time to get down to brass tacks, folks. Here's
the deal, my ex-husband is a deadbeat dad. For the third time in almost six
years he's not paying child support. The first time he was unemployed was
because he quit his job somewhere around March of 2011 to avoid getting into
trouble with his district manager and possibly getting fired. Then he moved to
Indiana in July of that year to be with a new girlfriend, leaving our kids and
me living in a homeless shelter where we'd had to move because of his lack of monetary
contribution. He didn't get another job until January of 2012. That's 10 months
of being jobless while his kids were in a homeless shelter!
He ran away from the chick in IN, moving back to Missouri and in with a new woman. The constant drinking and fighting with the new woman lead to him drunk driving with our three kids in the car. To protect my kids I petitioned the court for supervised visitation; he refused to see them after that. In November 2013 he lost his job and his woman. He moved around the country mooching off friends and family, finally ending up back on Long Island with the help of his father and step-mother. He didn't get another job until August of 2014. That's nine more months of no support for our children, 15 total at this point. After 19 months, in March of 2016, he quit his job again. This was the day after my boss died, effectively leaving me with zero income. I had no job and no child support.
He informed me on June 14th of this year that he got another job and was starting on the 15th. I received two child support payments in July - one for $28 and the other for $22. Child Support Enforcement investigated the low payments and informed me this morning that my ex had been terminated from this most recent job on July 6th - he didn't even last a month - and those two payments are all CSE received. Add on another four months to date of him not paying child support.
So in the past five-and-a-half years he has neglected to pay child support for 23 months, almost two full years of non-payment and I'm tired of it. During his months of non-payment I'm left to struggle to make ends meet, and my children are having to do without. Now is even worse than in the past.
Although my friends sometimes help me I can't continue letting them. I'm doing everything I can from working babysitting jobs, to cleaning homes, to taking weekend work from a temp agency just so I can gather enough money to keep our bills paid and to make sure I have enough gas money to continue to look for full-time work. The food stamps I get from the state are not enough to cover us for a month, especially with the kids out of school, so I'm always scrounging for cash for milk and bread, at the least. And don't tell me to budget better; trust me, I can squeeze a dollar from a dime.
My ex won't answer my text messages, won't keep me up to date on what's going on with regard to his job searches, and won't send me any money at all just to help me get by. He seems to enjoy the fact that I'm struggling and his kids are doing without while he and his girlfriend live off the funds of her parents. I can only assume her parents are helping them because I know his aren't and last I knew his girlfriend only had a part-time job, not nearly enough to support the two of them.
Meanwhile, between April and July he's posted on Facebook the numerous times he and his girlfriend have gone out to dinner or of him cooking dinner and cleaning their house, playing with their cat, watching movies together, running errands, and working on his girlfriend's car (rather than looking for a job), and he was tagged in photos with her family - birthday dinners in restaurants, family get-togethers in restaurants, and all of them enjoying July 4th riding around in a limousine.
He's living it up while his kids can't even get new school clothes, shoes, haircuts, and whatever else they need to start the school year that begins in two weeks. He claims, from his posts - which I can no longer see, by the way, because he blocked me from Facebook - that he misses his kids and that it pains him to be separated from them. He's the one who moved away, he's the one moving from home to home, girlfriend to girlfriend (at least 12 in the past 10 years), and job to job - and NOT PAYING HIS CHILD SUPPORT!!
He'll be 44 years old in September and can't get his act together enough to find a job, stay employed, and support the children he claims to love so very much. He's a deadbeat and can't even be described as a father at this point. I have no legal recourse, can't force him to get a job, can't make him see what he's doing to his kids, but I can let everyone else know that he's not all he claims to be. He lives for himself, always has, always will. And when his kids no longer want anything to do with him he'll have nobody to blame but himself.
He ran away from the chick in IN, moving back to Missouri and in with a new woman. The constant drinking and fighting with the new woman lead to him drunk driving with our three kids in the car. To protect my kids I petitioned the court for supervised visitation; he refused to see them after that. In November 2013 he lost his job and his woman. He moved around the country mooching off friends and family, finally ending up back on Long Island with the help of his father and step-mother. He didn't get another job until August of 2014. That's nine more months of no support for our children, 15 total at this point. After 19 months, in March of 2016, he quit his job again. This was the day after my boss died, effectively leaving me with zero income. I had no job and no child support.
He informed me on June 14th of this year that he got another job and was starting on the 15th. I received two child support payments in July - one for $28 and the other for $22. Child Support Enforcement investigated the low payments and informed me this morning that my ex had been terminated from this most recent job on July 6th - he didn't even last a month - and those two payments are all CSE received. Add on another four months to date of him not paying child support.
So in the past five-and-a-half years he has neglected to pay child support for 23 months, almost two full years of non-payment and I'm tired of it. During his months of non-payment I'm left to struggle to make ends meet, and my children are having to do without. Now is even worse than in the past.
Although my friends sometimes help me I can't continue letting them. I'm doing everything I can from working babysitting jobs, to cleaning homes, to taking weekend work from a temp agency just so I can gather enough money to keep our bills paid and to make sure I have enough gas money to continue to look for full-time work. The food stamps I get from the state are not enough to cover us for a month, especially with the kids out of school, so I'm always scrounging for cash for milk and bread, at the least. And don't tell me to budget better; trust me, I can squeeze a dollar from a dime.
My ex won't answer my text messages, won't keep me up to date on what's going on with regard to his job searches, and won't send me any money at all just to help me get by. He seems to enjoy the fact that I'm struggling and his kids are doing without while he and his girlfriend live off the funds of her parents. I can only assume her parents are helping them because I know his aren't and last I knew his girlfriend only had a part-time job, not nearly enough to support the two of them.
Meanwhile, between April and July he's posted on Facebook the numerous times he and his girlfriend have gone out to dinner or of him cooking dinner and cleaning their house, playing with their cat, watching movies together, running errands, and working on his girlfriend's car (rather than looking for a job), and he was tagged in photos with her family - birthday dinners in restaurants, family get-togethers in restaurants, and all of them enjoying July 4th riding around in a limousine.
He's living it up while his kids can't even get new school clothes, shoes, haircuts, and whatever else they need to start the school year that begins in two weeks. He claims, from his posts - which I can no longer see, by the way, because he blocked me from Facebook - that he misses his kids and that it pains him to be separated from them. He's the one who moved away, he's the one moving from home to home, girlfriend to girlfriend (at least 12 in the past 10 years), and job to job - and NOT PAYING HIS CHILD SUPPORT!!
He'll be 44 years old in September and can't get his act together enough to find a job, stay employed, and support the children he claims to love so very much. He's a deadbeat and can't even be described as a father at this point. I have no legal recourse, can't force him to get a job, can't make him see what he's doing to his kids, but I can let everyone else know that he's not all he claims to be. He lives for himself, always has, always will. And when his kids no longer want anything to do with him he'll have nobody to blame but himself.
Until next time...peace to all.
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