Today I had a rather enjoyable day. I spoke for maybe a total of fifteen minutes all day long - once each to the kids' friends who knocked on the door, and twice to the guy at QuikTrip when I went to get smokes and then cookies and milk. The rest of my conversations were between my cats and me. I did most of the talking but it still wasn't for very long.
I watched TV, played video games on the computer, and occasionally checked in on my friends on Facebook. After the second or third time, though, I stopped checking. It was actually irritating me today. Ask me why and I'll tell you. Eh, never mind, I'll tell you anyway. I use Facebook as a fun place to visit my friends, to share pictures of the kids, and to communicate with people who I generally don't get the chance to call on the phone. I occasionally post a rant or gripe that I'm having but for the most part I take great pleasure in seeing what everyone is up to in their lives and sharing what I'm up to in mine. Lately, though, I'm starting to get aggravated with a few people and I'm about to start hiding their posts.
I've already hidden the posts of one friend who has spent the past two-three years living a new and healthy lifestyle. There's nothing wrong with that, right? Right. He wants to be healthy and fit and that's wonderful except for the fact that he posts, ad nauseam, about his lifestyle. He uses a well-known workout program and posts every single time he works out, what he does during the workout, how he feels after the workout. He posts pictures of almost every meal he eats and all the new meals he's created out of tofu, kale and whatever other funky and organic foods he can find.
He also posts what he considers to be inspirational photos urging others to exercise and eat healthy, too. Not just one or two, but dozens at a time. I know I'm not a health nut and I could do more to get in shape and eat better but I really don't need anyone cramming their healthy lifestyle down my throat on a daily basis. He's almost as bad as the people who constantly post their religious or political views for all to see.
Most of us post inspirational, uplifting, feel-good pictures when we find them. I've done it myself and have posted a few in a row if I've seen some that I like but I don't make it my mission on a daily basis like some people do. My sister, who I haven't spoken to in a couple of years, was like that. Always trying to shove religion on me. "You need to find a church where you'll be comfortable. You'll feel better." Fuck that. I'm happy doing what I do when I do it and my religious or spiritual choices are my business. I don't often discuss them with anyone unless they ask and I don't spend my time posting them on Facebook. I have a few friends who do it all the time. I know their views, do I have to be reminded of them every time I visit my page?
The same goes for the couple of friends who are cramming their political views down my throat constantly. They don't like the President and apparently want to make sure that everyone knows it. No, Tracy, you're not one of them; I'm referring to a different couple of people. :) Lately their views have been focused on the gun laws and bans and all that. Almost every single post I see from them is based on all the wrong things the President has done and is doing with regard to the country and, specifically, the weapons issues.
I have my own thoughts on the issue but I'm not going to voice them here. I will say, though, that everyone who keeps citing the second amendment needs to go back and read it word for word, and look up the definitions of those words they don't understand. "The right to bear arms" is not the entire amendment, there's more to it than that. So stop saying your rights are being infringed upon until you actually know what the entire wording is.
As far as the President is concerned, it really makes my teeth itch when people post pictures with sayings or slogans that are negative toward the President. They don't have a clue about the truth of what's being done in D.C. and neither do I. Quite honestly these people are spreading negative propaganda, I'm assuming, to try to sway others to their way of thinking. It doesn't work with me because I'm not convinced of anything unless I've seen concrete proof.
I don't care who's in office. Nobody will ever know exactly what's been done or not done so we all need to cut the bullshit when it comes to putting down the government. All Presidents have made mistakes regardless of their party yet people seem to want to blame whoever they didn't vote for rather than admitting that each past mistake led up to present ones. These are the same people who blame their exes for relationships gone bad and who blame the school because Junior can't spell when they are too busy to work with him at home.
I just really got annoyed today when I was trying to have a good day alone and kept seeing all this negative government blaming and "Like if you love Jesus" crap constantly. I figured I'd have a better day if I just stayed off of Facebook, and I was right. I had a lovely day and am still having a good evening. I never did any of the work I needed to do today because I just wanted a day of pure relaxation. I'll get the work done tomorrow before the kids get home and, with luck, I'll be able to check in on Facebook for a bit of humor every now and again. If not I'll definitely get to hiding posts because I'd rather spend my day smiling without itchy teeth. It makes for a much more pleasant day.
Until next time...peace to all.
The kids are with their dad this weekend and if they actually stay both days I'll get a much-needed break and some time to myself. Fingers crossed on that for me please. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids but I do need a break every now and again, and this past couple of weeks has been a little rough.
Zach's behavior got so out of control that two counselors actually recommended that I have him evaluated by the local children's mental hospital. They take kids in for a 72-hour watch and then, more times than not, end up putting them on meds. That won't work for me for two reasons. First, I don't approve of meds for children unless every other possible method of stabilization has been tried first. Second, Zach only gets out of control with me. Everyone outside of our home thinks he's the best kid they've ever met so him being in a hospital won't show the doctors anything.
I spoke to Zach about it, though, and he and I had a long discussion about why he does what he does and he explained a few things to me. He says it stems from negative emotions he has about his dad so I told him he and I would work on ways for him to get rid of the negative quickly so there isn't an explosion of any kind. He agreed to try and for the past few days things have been much more pleasant around here. YAY ZACH!
Paul has also been texting me constantly, too. He's worried that he'll be going to jail when we go to court on Tuesday for the order of protection. I told him to back off the drama because this is only to make sure he stays out of my home. Then he wanted to know why the kids do and say some of the things they do and I explained, for the umpteenth time, that they're afraid of him so they're going to tell him what they think he wants to hear. Blah, blah, blah... He keeps asking me the same questions and I keep giving him the same answers. It's like talking to a wall.
Today he actually wanted to know how he and I could work on being friends. I told him I haven't though about it and that I think we're cordial enough to benefit the kids. I don't really think I need to be friends with him and don't really think I can be friends with him. I've kicked friends out of my life already because I don't like or trust them. He's another one but I have to have him in my life because of our kids. I didn't tell him all of that, I stopped at the "cordial" part. The rest was just me throwing my thoughts into the mix here.
I don't really see any way that I'll ever trust him again given our past and his history of lying and sneakiness. It doesn't matter if he's being honest because there's always a little niggling in the back of my brain that tells me he's up to something, something that will benefit him with an attempt at trying to make me look bad. Whatever. I did explain to him that the kids are having problems believing him and that their fear of him will take a while to go away, if it ever does. He claims to understand but I'm not so sure, so I threw in a dig simply because I needed to for my own pleasure.
I told him that they may not be pleased with him but his attempts at trying to buy their forgiveness with all the dining out and gifts he's gotten them is a good start at winning them back. He ignored my comment so he either didn't get it or was too embarrassed to say anything in reply. Generally when he doesn't say anything it's because he knows I'm right. I just wish he'd keep that in his mind as a given. When it comes to the way he acts and treats the kids I'm always right. :)
Anyway, just checking in and having a nice relaxing evening to myself. I had a bit of a break on Thursday but that was just for a few hours. Today I got the house cleaned so I don't have anything to do all weekend, I can just sit and watch TV if I want to. I do have a bit of work to do but it's easy and will go quickly. For now I'm going to sign off and watch a movie before I turn in. It's so nice to feel at ease for the first time in a while.
Until next time...peace to all.
Last night I talked about two commercials, or infomercials, that I found amusing. Tonight I have two more that make me bust a gut every time I see them; I can't help it, the propaganda is just so STUPID. It actually amazes me that people believe the shit enough to buy the products. I have a lot to say, though, so please bear with me.
The first one starts with a montage of people walking their dogs, or rather dogs walking their people. Each dog is forcefully pulling its owner across the lawn, down the walkway, or wherever they may be; you get the picture. The voice over is talking about how difficult it is to keep control of your dog so they're offering you a new leash that will allow you to "instantly" get control over your dog.
It's not a regular leash or a choke chain, it's a special type of leash that attaches to the dog's collar and then runs down the back and around the dog's middle near the hips and transforms "any dog from unruly puller to perfect walker...instantly." Really? The end of the leash that the owner grasps now comes up from the dog's back near the butt rather than from its neck so I guess that's what's supposed to allow the owner to get this instant control. Does that make sense to you?
The ad actually shows a dog pulling its owner but the second this special leash is attached the dog walks with a perfect gait alongside the owner. I say bullshit!! What you have when you attach the leash is a two-point tether allowing the dog to have twice the pull on the owner. There is no way in the world simply attaching this leash will instantly tame any dog and I don't care what the inventors say about it. I still say bullshit!!
It's supposed to make it easier to walk numerous dogs at once, too. HAH I say...HAH!! You can't bullshit a bullshitter, people. Rather than having six dogs all pulling and tugging in different directions the magic leash makes them all walk perfectly in a nice, orderly group - according to the ad. It's too bad the ad doesn't show all the training the dogs went through before they got to be TV stars. It's crap, ladies and gents; don't believe it. But if you do believe it and decide to try it, try this next item also; your life will be transformed.
This ad starts off with people opening their cabinets and all their plastic storage dishes come tumbling to the floor in a disorganized heap. We can't have that, can we? No, of course not. What we need is an easier way to store and reheat our leftovers that doesn't cause a mess in the cabinets, doesn't leave us searching for mismatched lids, and doesn't leave us with melting containers. We all need to order this new dome thingy that fits directly onto any plate we own. Just put the dome over the food on the plate and push down on the big button on the top to squish the air out from underneath it and voila!, instant storage dish. It's a fucking joke, if you ask me.
It's supposed to replace all the smaller plastic containers that we all buy, the ones that stack up nicely in the cabinets and in the fridger on top of one another, the ones we can simply throw away when they get ruined in some manner, and the ones that are of minimal expense. The dome is ridiculous. Not only is it about 3" tall off the plate, but the button on top of it stands another 3/4" off the top of the dome. How the fuck are they supposed to stack in the fridger? They don't!
I don't know about you but when I have leftovers I don't dish them out on a plate for eating at a later date, I save them in individual containers so that I can mix and match for another dinner or for snacking, depending on what the food may be. The dome won't do me any good. It did a fine job for the dad in the ad who takes his lunch to work, though. He drove along happily to work with his domed plate sitting on the passenger seat - who does that? - and, at lunch time, he sat at his desk, turned the button on top of the dome to release the pressure, and lifted it off to eat his freshly-heated plate of food, straight from the microwave. Nice, right? Maybe for him, not for me.
When I did take lunch to work I packed it neatly into one small microwaveable container, put the container in a bag for easy toting, ate, rinsed the dish and put it back in the bag to take it home. This dude now has to carry the plate plus the dome into work and back home again. I hope he doesn't have anything else to carry because he's already lost the use of one hand just to carry his lunch crap.
Not only is it supposed to be convenient but it's also supposed to be sturdy as shown by the kid knocking one dome-sealed plate off table, the plate not breaking and the dome not detaching from the plate; and by the hefty dude who stood on another domed plate. Not one crack appeared in the dome. YAY!! I'd love to try that myself but, unfortunately, I'm not paying the whopping $11.99 for the dome - ONE dome.
For the conveniently-low price of $48, plus shipping and handling, I can preserve my kids' and my leftovers on their original plates in the fridger, on separate shelves because they won't stack without tipping, and we can all enjoy the same meal over again. It would have to be the next night because there wouldn't be enough room in the fridger for me to store more leftovers from a different meal; I also wouldn't have a way to store them because I've gotten rid of all my handy, dandy plastic storage containers to make room for the dopey dome.
I'd love to know who comes up with this crap and who, in the patent office sees it and decides it's a really great product that people will love. Someone needs to be smacked upside the head for even thinking of producing this shit. Honestly. Magic leashes for perfect dogs and super-dopey domes for perfect leftovers...I've got to find a better use of my time than watching idiotic infomercials. Then again, I do get a certain amount of pleasure from making fun of them. Then I share my views with you because I'm hoping you'll see the humor, too. Maybe you do, maybe you don't; at least I had a good laugh.
Until next time...peace to all.
I usually stay up late at night after the kids go to sleep just so I can have some quiet, alone time. I generally sit in my bed watching TV and although I don't really pay much attention to commercials I occasionally come across a few that I have to watch repeatedly just to make sure the products are stupid as I think they are. I've written about some in previous posts. Recently I came across four that I wanted to talk about but I'm not sure I'll get to them all tonight. I'm not going to mention the name of the products because I don't want to advertise for the companies but I'm sure you'll get the idea of what they are from my descriptions.
The first product I saw was a pill that helps overweight people lose their excess pounds. That's not a surprising product as they seem to be popping up all over the place these days. What got my attention with this one was the wording in the ad. The spokeswoman said "researchers have discovered a capsule" to help people lose weight. "Researchers have discovered a capsule..." Those were her words.
Does that mean that for all these years there's been a capsule floating around that nobody found or could identify until now? Or does it mean that someone was digging around somewhere and found a capsule in the back of a drawer and decided to test it to see what it does? Seriously? Wouldn't the ad company be more convincing if they said that researchers have developed a combination of drugs to help people lose weight and they've put the drugs into capsule form? The researchers of this product didn't discover the capsule, capsules have been around for hundreds of years; the researchers only worked with the ingredients within the capsule. DUH!!
Within minutes after seeing that commercial I saw another that made me laugh so hard I had to cover my face with my pillow so I wouldn't wake my kids. It's a device that women can wear to give themselves an instant face lift. An instant face lift, imagine that. Who needs to pay thousands of dollars for surgery when we can use this new and imaginative product to make ourselves look younger in an instant?
This device reminds me of the headgear from old-time braces, you know what I mean, the big rubber band that goes from one side of the braces around the back of the head and attaches to the other side of the braces. The face lift device looked similar only it didn't go all the way to the corners of the woman's mouth. At the ends of the band are two small combs. The woman braids two small sections of her hair at her temples, one on each side of her head, attaches one of the combs to one of the braids, runs the band around the back of her head, under her hair, to the braid on the other side and covers the combs when she pulls the sides of her hair down around her face. The band then pulls taught so the skin of her face is instantly lifted for a fresh, wrinkle-free look. Hmmm...
What's wrong with that, you ask. Well, I'll tell ya. First, having my hair pulled tight enough to lift the skin of my face would be quite painful after a while. It hurts when I pull it without the band just to see if the face lift is actually possible. I know because I did it after seeing the commercial. Second, what happens if I wear this band for a night out with my lady friends and I meet a wonderful guy? We get along, we chat, maybe dance, and he asks me for my phone number. I go home happily enchanted by the prospect of this new man in my life. Then I go get ready for bed and, quite literally, let my face down, and then rub my temples to get rid of the pain from all the pulling they went through all night. Gee, didn't think of that when we invented this product, did we?
Now, every time I see this guy I'm going to have to wear my face lift rubber band. I can't wear a ponytail around him because he'd see the band at the sides of my face and around the back of my head. I can't just shower, get dressed, and run out the door to meet him, either, because I have to take the time to put my face up before I go. It's either keep up the facade of the wrinkle-free me or, surprise, surprise, tell him I'm a fake and not the young-looking chick he met on that first night. Talk about starting the relationship off on the wrong foot, or face, as it may be more appropriate to say.
Who comes up with this shit? Someone actually came up with the stupid ad campaign for the weight loss capsule and someone else actually sat in his or her living room trying to find a way for women to fake their natural look in seconds. I'm sure both companies have high sales volumes; the person who invented the face lift thingy is probably laughing all the way to the bank. But am I the only one who thinks of the consequences? A friend of mine actually thought of the same thing I did when I mentioned the face lift device to her, but how many others will spend their money on the item before realizing what a piece of crap it is? I'm guessing we'll never know.
Tomorrow I have two more products that are even more amusing than tonight's; I think so anyway. Maybe you will, too; you'll just have to wait to find out. Until then, maybe you can ponder the wonders of the newly discovered weight-loss capsule and the stretchy-pully face lift rubber band and how they'll help people all over the world improve their lives.
Until next time...peace to all.
My new year isn't starting off all that well. Since the Sunday before New Year's Eve, the 30th of December, my entire home has been in a state of upheaval that I can't even describe without spending hours writing it all out. Let's just say that my ex went on a drunken, abusive rampage in my home when he dropped the kids off after their weekend visit with him. He scared the living shit out of our kids and forced me to call the police just to get him to leave my home. I went on Monday to try to get an order of protection against him; I have a court date on Tuesday to see if the judge will actually grant it.
My kids, however, won't speak to Paul, don't want anything to do with him, refuse to speak to him on the phone, won't visit him at his house, and don't want him coming over here for any reason. I don't blame them in the least and won't force the issue of them seeing him. I'm waiting for my attorney to get back to me on whether or not I have to make them go for their visits. Just more waiting for me.
Because of this event, my kids' behavior has been completely unacceptable, especially Zach's. He's nine and has been hurt - not in the physical sense - by his dad more times than any child deserves to be hurt by a parent. Since I'm the 'safe' parent, however, Zach has been taking his problems out on my and I'm seriously fed up with it. Ever since Paul moved near us Zach's been a little off kilter but now he's totally out of control.
He spends his time screaming and yelling at me, telling me how stupid I am, that I can't do anything right, that I'm a terrible person, that he hates me, etc. I know he's just being a kid and is having trouble dealing with his anger but there is only so much I can take. I've been a verbal punching bag all my life for at least one person who was close to me at one time or another. I won't stand it from my kids and it's getting to the point that I don't even want to be around Zach because I never know when he'll explode on me or his siblings.
I've signed all three kids up for counseling at CAPA, where they used to go but there is a waiting list. It's not a long wait, maybe a couple of weeks, but I honestly don't know what to do until then. Zach walks around screaming that he gets blamed for everything that happens here, that I don't listen to him, that everyone hates him. In all honesty, he sounds exactly like his dad - Paul tends to play the martyr in all situations so his entourage of women friends will take pity on him - and I'm really tired of hearing the same bullshit over and over from Zach.
My mind is in chaos; no matter how hard I try to think straight and get my shit together it doesn't seem to work. I spend my time watching TV and playing games on Pogo just so I don't have to think about all the crap that's going on now and so I don't totally lose complete control of my sanity. I'm really at a total loss as to what to do with Zach and his violent temper.
Ever since Paul's explosion on Sunday my PTSD has kicked in full force so any loud outbursts from the kids cause me to go immediately into sensory overload and I have to leave the room just so I don't have a complete meltdown. That's not right; I'm not supposed to want to spend my time in my own room, away from my kids, just so I don't have to hear their voices but that's what it's become lately.
I know it'll change once the kids are in counseling, and I'm pretty sure it'll get worse before it gets better. I've been through it before when the boys were younger and Dolly was just a baby so I know I can get through it again, I would just like to know when I'll be able to have some constant peace in our lives where we won't have to all be on alert of one another.
Anyway, I just really felt the need to vent and this is the only place I can do it without having to listen to anyone scream a response to me. Not that my friends actually scream at me but it sometimes feels that way. For now I'm just gonna keep pressing on and taking things day by day, and hopefully the kids and I can get started on a path to recovery - again - and get our lives back to the way they were before Paul. Fingers crossed for us.
Until next time... peace to all.
