A Little Odd

A few minutes ago I was washing my hands, as all mommies do – for the 80th time today – and I remembered something that happened last night that made me laugh. I was setting the table and reached for the napkins. There were very few left in the holder and I was hoping there would be enough for all the place settings. I got lucky; there was one more than I needed. I couldn’t just put that one napkin back in the holder so I grabbed a stack from the package in the pantry but before I could put them in the holder, I had to remove the single remaining napkin and place it at the front of the supply.

Why? I’ll tell you why. I can’t replace anything where there is only one or two left without putting the remaining items up front so they will be sure to get used and not left behind. I actually felt bad for that one last, lonely napkin and needed to make sure that the next time someone needed a napkin it would get used before the new ones behind it. I don’t know why I do that; it’s just something I HAVE to do. It doesn’t matter what it is. If I’m down to one last anything, it has to get used before its replacements. How sad would that be for that one item to keep getting shoved to the back of the pile or stack to never get used?

I was laughing about it because I mentioned it to Kara as I did it and she said she does the same thing. Then I started telling her about more of my quirks and we laughed because we both do many of the same odd things, but some of mine are just mine. For instance, I count steps when I walk, especially if I’m going up or down a flight of stairs. I don’t know why I count them; I just do. I get out of the car and count the number of steps it takes me to get to the door of wherever I’m going. Then I’ll count the steps from inside the door to my final destination. No, it’s not a continuation; it’s a new count.

When I’m on stairs I count going up and going down; even if it’s the same flight of stairs. The number hasn’t changed, but I have to count it anyway. I my home in Independence I counted the stairs all the time. There were 14 going from the main floor to the upper level; and 13 going down to the basement. I know this for a fact because I counted them every single time I walked on them. I told you, I don’t know why; it’s just something I do. And I only do it when I'm alone; If I'm walking with someone I don't do it.

I also have to make sure I check my alarm clock three times every night. I never change the time it’s set for because the kids and I have to get up at the same time every morning during school season. But before I turn off my TV to go to sleep, I slide the “Alarm On” button to the ‘on’ position and press the time button to make sure the alarm time is correct. Then I push on the ‘on’ button again to make sure it’s still on and I confirm the time again. One last time and I’m good to go to sleep. If I don’t do it three times I can’t sleep and I have to turn the light on again and check the clock. Even if I’ve already done it twice, I have to do the whole thing over again to make sure I do it three times.

The funniest thing I mentioned that I do I thought was really odd until Kara said she does the same thing. I’ve never heard of anyone else doing this but I guess I’m not alone. See, I can’t touch a towel to dry my hands unless both hands are wet. If I’m cooking or wiping the table with a wet sponge or, for whatever reason, need to wash just one hand, I can’t get the towel to dry that hand until I swipe the dry hand with the wet one. It’s a "must" in my brain. I don’t get the dry hand completely soaked; but I’ll take the wet one and swipe the entire palm side of the dry hand from wrist to finger tips with the palm of the wet hand as if I was brushing off dirt. The difference is that I’m trying to get the dry hand wet; if it’s not wet, I can’t reach for the towel. Does that make any sense at all? I did when it was in my head but now it sounds confusing as I’m typing it.

When I told Kara about the towel thing she shouted, “I do the same thing!!” and the two of us burst out laughing. How odd is that and why do we do it? I don’t know so I thought I’d put it out there to you. Maybe you have some quirky things you do, too. Now you know you’re not alone. Perhaps we’ve all got some little idiosyncrasies. Think about it; I’m sure you can come up with something. I know that I can’t brush my teeth until the cap is back on the tube; I can’t wipe peanut butter off a knife with a sponge; and I can’t sleep unless the blankets/sheets are tucked in at the bottom of the bed and are not wrinkled in any way. If the blanket is crumpled around my legs or feet, I have to get up, straighten them out, and tuck them in properly.

I can’t help but laugh when I think of things like this. I guess it’s just things that make me who I am. Steve used the laugh at me at bed time when I’d fuss and fidget trying to get the blankets just right, and I laugh at myself with the towel thing (it’s a little freaky, actually, because I really can’t touch the towel with only one wet hand). I have to laugh at all of my little oddities. You can laugh too; I don’t mind. Just remember, if you laugh at me, I get to laugh at you. Heck, let’s all just confess and we can have a big laughing party. That would be cool. Just don’t mess with my alarm clock or I may never be the same again.

Until next time…peace to all.

Same Old Dilemmas, Repeating

Yesterday I said I was feeling much better. Today I’m almost back to 100%. Being able to turn my head is a blessing, especially when it comes to driving. Pinched nerves happen, but they heal. I’m sure it’ll happen again, too; I just hope not too soon.

Anyway, here’s my dilemma. Remember I talked about the issues I’m having trying to get the boys on buses and Dolly to school? It’s happening again. Tomorrow, Wednesday, and Thursday are big problems this week. I’ll spell it out for you. Ty and Big Boy have to get on their bus at 8:00; Dolly has to be in school 20 minutes away at 8:15; and Zach and Little Boy have to get on their bus at 9:00. On the butt end of the day Ty and Big Boy get off their bus at 3:00; Dolly has to be retrieved by 3:15; and Zach and Little Boy get off their bus at 4:00.

What’s been happening is that I leave the house with Dolly at 7:50 and Kara gets the first two boys loaded on their bus at 8:00. I get Dolly to school, help her and the teacher set the tables for breakfast and I’m back home in time to get Zach and Little Boy on their bus. The same happens in the afternoon. Kara is here for the first bus while I pick up Dolly, and I’m home again in time for the second bus to arrive. It’s been working pretty well so far. The problems are starting to creep up on us now.

Tomorrow Kara has to leave at 9:15 for business meetings and won’t be back in time for the afternoon buses. If I wait for the 3:00 bus to arrive and take the boys with me to pick up Dolly, I might, because of really heavy traffic at that hour, be really late getting her and that’s not permitted unless I pay to keep her there for the extra time. I can’t do that. Even if I could pick her up late, we may not be back in time for the second bus. Instead, I have to pick her up an hour early to be able to make it back in time for both buses.

Then, on Wednesday, Kara and the boys won’t even be here. They’re staying with her mom Tuesday night so they can all go into the City on Wednesday to do a family thing. I’m here alone to get all my kids off to and home from school. If I take Zach and Ty with me to drop off Dolly, Ty will be late for school. If I stay and put Ty on his bus and then take Zach with me to drop off Dolly, she will be late for school. Either way I do it one kid will be late for school and will miss breakfast. Yes, I could feed that child at home but that means we all have to get up earlier than we already do and that makes for cranky children. Since I’m not a morning person, cranky and I don’t get along very well.

So now say I decide to drop Dolly off late on Wednesday. Everyone has their day in school but I’m back to the issue of picking up someone early or picking up someone late. I’m screwed either way. If I drop off Dolly late and pick her up early, I’m basically wasting gas and time for her to have an extremely shortened day. Is it worth it? I’m thinking it’s not. Since she’s only in Pre-K I think it’s better to make sure the boys actually get to school on time and be able to finish their full days. I’m leaning toward just keeping Dolly at home with me on Wednesday and getting some things done around here. I hate having to do it but I hate the thought of wasting my gas for her to be in school for a half day even more.

I spent a lot of time on the phone today calling bus companies to see if I can arrange transportation for her. It was all in vain. The bus companies around here only work in their respective school districts and won’t cross lines. That’s really annoying since I’m sure a lot of the parents that take their kids to Dolly’s school would prefer to have their child transported on a bus rather than having to make the drive every day, twice a day. It also sucks that the Federal government won’t allot them the funding to hire buses for their students. What makes that really bad is that they, those government people, don’t take into consideration that parents like me don’t have the resources needed in situations like this. If I wasn’t living in Kara’s home I’d have never have been able to put Dolly in school this year.

I guess I’ll just have to look forward to next year when Dolly will be in Kindergarten and will be on the bus every morning. That will also allow me the time to find work; I hope. Right now I’m down to asking for internships or volunteering for attorneys. Nobody who’s hiring wants anyone that doesn’t have experience – “At least two years experience required.” That doesn’t give someone like me very many opportunities. I’ll have to study the NY Rules of Civil Procedure and offer myself to every attorney in town here just to get some basic experience. The bus situation makes that all the harder because I can only work from 9:30 to about 2:30. How many employers are willing to pay someone to work only five hours a day? Not many in the legal field; hence the need for an internship or volunteer work.

If I can get someone to let me work for a lesser salary, or even for free, to gain some needed experience, maybe next year, when school is in session after the summer, I’ll be able to get hired on full time somewhere and show the legal world that I am the shit at what I know how to do. Right now it’s the best I can hope for. I even thought about being a process server just to make some money nights while I work volunteering as a paralegal a couple of hours during the day. Turns out that process servers in NY need to be licensed and have to post a $10,000 surety bond just to work independently. I could work for a company and not have to post the bond but I’d still have to pay for the license and that’s a couple of hundred dollars. Grrrrrrrrrrrr…

I just need one little piece of positive energy to come flowing my way. I said the other day that I can feel the energy shifting toward the positive; it’s just not shifting quickly enough for me. I’m too impatient. Have I mentioned that? I’m sure I have. I just can’t stand that each thing I want to do with my life is contingent upon something else happening first. It sucks but there’s nothing I can do about it. It is what it is. No, I’m not complaining, just telling it like it is. Maybe tomorrow I’ll have something more exciting to tell you. If not, you get what you get and you don’t throw a fit.

Until next time…peace to all.

Clueless

I’m feeling much better today. I spent yesterday taking Ibuprofen and muscle relaxants and sitting with a heating pad and ice packs on my neck and shoulder. I actually got to sleep all night long last night. The couple of nights before I kept waking up every couple of hours because I’d try to turn in my sleep and the pain in my neck would wake me – I couldn’t turn my head at all and had to use my hands to hold it steady while I changed position. Last night I didn’t have that problem. Thank goodness.

When I woke up this morning I felt better; although I still have a lot of pain I’m not as stiff as I was and can actually turn my head to the side and can, sort of, dip it backwards. I even got some more unpacking done today. I didn’t carry any full boxes; I split the contents into two separate boxes and then slid them down the stairs to the basement. Then I put everything away. I got a lot done, too, but Kara told me to take it easy so I didn’t reinjure myself. I did as she told me; she’s a nurse so I won’t argue with her, especially since she took such good care of me Friday and yesterday.

With all the work I got done today you’d think I got nothing done given the mess that’s still down here. You know how you start spring cleaning or the overhaul of a single room and before everything is complete you’ve got a bigger mess than when you started? That’s what happened down here. I had boxes and boxes of books and movies – the kids and I have dozens of each – and I found places for everything. Then I pulled out my photos and hung some up and found places for others on dressers, bookshelves, wherever. The place actually looks pretty good except for the empty boxes folded and stuffed into other empty boxes.

Then I’ve got more boxes of things I can’t put out yet but have consolidated; taking what’s left in box A and putting in with the stuff from box B. I still have more boxes to get out of the garage and am getting closer to making room for Kara’s car, so I’ll do as much as I can tomorrow. I’m please with the work I’ve gotten done and the kids loved the new “décor” when they got home. I was at the supermarket when Paul got here with them and Kara stood by the basement stairs as the kids came down and yelled, “Wow, look at all the cool new stuff down here.” Kara told them, in front of Paul, “Yes, Mommy’s been working really hard to make things nice for you guys.” That made me feel good when she told me what she’d said to them.

What didn’t make me feel good was when the kids told me that “Dad and (girlfriend) might be getting married. Then she’ll be out step-mother and her kids will be our step-brother and step-sister.” As happy as I am that he may have found someone to settle down with, finally, what ever happened to parents discussing major life issues with the other parent before discussing it with the kids? I was not happy that he told them anything without mentioning it to me first. I can guarantee that he’d want me to discuss any big decisions with him before I told the kids.

He just doesn’t get it sometimes. I think I mentioned it before that he discusses visitation with the kids before he talks to me about it. He also discusses their clothing and what they say they have that fits and doesn’t fit. That’s not what he’s supposed to do; he’s supposed to discuss those issues with me, I’m the other parent to these children and I deserve that respect. I’m definitely going to be sending him an email on this. Lately, whenever I need to communicate with him, I send him texts that I then email to myself, or I just email him and keep copies of them.

This business of him discussing important issues with the kids has to stop. Tonight he texted me that we need to discuss the issue of the kids’ winter coats because the boys told him that their coats don’t fit. All three of these kids have two brand-new coats each, and all the coats fit the respective children. I told him that. He told me I needed to “double check that.” My response was that I already did and that the coats fit them fine. When I asked the boys why they told Paul that their coats didn’t fit Zach said, “Because they don’t fit us.” I made him try on his coat and he, very dramatically, shoved his arms through the sleeves deliberately making them appear too short. When I fixed the coat he laughed so I told him that there is a big difference between telling someone that a coat doesn’t fit and telling them that you don’t like the way it fits. He agreed.

I just really think Paul is overdoing his “I’m the better parent” bullshit. He doesn’t have a clue sometimes and really needs to back the fuck off of me about shit. This is why I have to document everything now. He’s so fucking sneaky that I wouldn’t put it past him that he’s already talking to an attorney trying to make plans to fight for custody rights. He’ll never win given that he wanted them at the outset of our divorce and so eagerly gave up the custody battle when his mistress threw him out of the house. Then he left the State and saw them once in a three-year period. He just doesn’t realize that past mistakes won’t look good for him in any court. I don’t think he’s speaking to an attorney, mind you, I’m just saying it’s in the realm of his sneaky-assed capabilities. So be it. I can handle whatever aggravation he wants to throw my way.

In any case, the kids did say that they had a fun time at his house and that they didn’t call me because they kept forgetting since they had so much to do. That I put on Paul, too. As their parent, he’s got the responsibility of making sure they do the right thing. He’s just clueless when it comes to shit like that. Makes me wonder if he’ll do the right thing at Christmas and take them shopping for a Mom gift this year. I doubt it, which will really piss off his mother, but I can’t really expect him to do the right thing. I never could.

Enough of my griping again tonight; that’s just the mood I’ve been in lately. Today, though, I could actually feel a shift in the energy around me. I don’t know what it is; it just seems as if something really good is heading toward me and I can’t wait to see what it is. Maybe it was because I got so much done today, or that the kids came home, I don’t know. But the feeling was almost tangible, and very uplifting. It just put me in a good mood. I did have to gripe tonight, though, to get all the ugly energy out of my system. Maybe I’ll have something more exciting to talk about tomorrow night. We’ll see.

Until next time…peace to all.

Pinched Nerve

I don’t really have a topic tonight because I didn’t do anything for the past two days. I pinched a nerve in my right shoulder at the beginning of the week and irritated it more with all my cleaning and organizing in the days following. I must have really overdone it on Thursday when I moved boxes of movies and books in from the garage because by Friday morning I hurt so badly I was in tears. I literally sat on the sofa all day yesterday alternating heat and ice and doing nothing but watching TV. I couldn’t do anything; every time I moved or tried to turn my head the pain hit hard enough to start the tears all over again.

The heat and ice help a little bit, and the Ibuprofen I’ve been taking does the same but they’re not working well enough to actually make the pain go away. Something’s gotta give. I had so many things I wanted to do before the kids get home tomorrow and I won’t be able to do them unless I get a huge miracle over night and my pain disappears. I hate feeling like this and I wish there was a way to release the pinched nerve but I can’t find one. I guess it’ll heal when it’s ready.

Meantime, I’ll just do what I can do and get as much done as I can before the kids get home. Maybe I can stretch it out while I move some more boxes in here and get them unpacked. That would be really nice since I don’t like pain and this one is really annoying. I can’t sit here any longer, though, because I need to lie down and try to relax. I should have some improvement by tomorrow; I’ll let you know. If I’m not here tomorrow night, you’ll know why.

Until next time…peace to all.

Thanksgving

Today, or should I say yesterday, was Thanksgiving. It’s 1:00 in the morning so I guess, technically, it would be yesterday. My kids are with their dad and Kara and her boys went to Jersey; all are still gone. I had the entire day to myself, the animals were here, of course, but I barely said ten words after Kara left this morning. I didn’t have anyone to talk to so there wasn’t much to say.

I had every intention of calling some friends but didn’t call anyone, until 8:00 in the evening when I tried to call my kids to say goodnight. Nobody answered the phone so I didn’t get to speak to them. That’s a blog for another time. Anyway, the nerve in my right shoulder is so badly pinched that I can barely turn my head in any direction, and I certainly can’t dip it backward at all. So I got up this morning and put an ice pack on it then helped Kara get her car packed for their overnighter.

After they were gone I made myself some breakfast and settled on the couch with a heating pad behind me and I watched the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. When that was done I still didn’t feel like doing much so I put on Netflix and tried to find something I haven’t seen in years. One thing that came to mind was “21 Jump Street” and I’m sure you all remember it. I watched about four episodes when I decided to come down here to get some more boxes unpacked. I got about seven in from the garage and unpacked, then decided it was time for a break.

I went back upstairs, made myself some leftover chicken fingers and baked beans then settled back on the heating pad. I turned “21 Jump Street” and sat there on the sofa for the rest of the night. I snacked on Milk Duds while I reflected on things that have happened over this past year; things for which I am thankful. I can’t say enough about everything I learned in MO from friends, neighbors and especially CAPA and the people I know from there, some of who are still friends.

Ellen and Sonny gave us a home for a while and, although plans didn’t work out as I wanted them to, I’m still grateful for the opportunity I had to live there. They’re such wonderful people and I do miss them. I just wish there was more time in the day to actually call Ellen and chat. Then Kara stepped into the picture and offered us a home in her house. Things are working out wonderfully here. We’re helping each other and getting things done. We balance each other perfectly, and always know when the other needs a little extra help during the day.

Of course I’m thankful for my kids and my health and my life. Those are givens. Aside from my MO friends, I’ve got numerous other friends, some I know from school, and others are friends I’ve returned to here in NY. I’m thankful for all of them, and I’m really thankful for the opportunity to get my life in order and to make a better life for my kids and me. Many people played a role to help me get here and I can’t thank anyone enough. There are no words.

I had a really great day today even though I spent it alone. I hope all of you had a spectacular Thanksgiving and enjoyed the time you spent with family and/or friends. Please know that I thought of all of you; I was just enjoying my alone time so much that I didn’t want to disturb it. No offense; I just haven’t had this much time to myself in a long time and decided to be a little selfish. I know you understand. My day is done, now, though and I’ve got to get some rest. The dogs will be up early wanting to eat and go out so I need to get some rest, and to try to relax my shoulder. Happy Thanksgiving.

Until next time…peace to all.

Semi-Bad Day Ended Well

I finally got my closure letter from Maryland Department of Social Services so Kara and I set out for Suffolk County Social Services today. I’m going to apply for my benefits and she’s going to try to see if she qualifies for anything. I don’t know if she will but I do know that I will. This office, though, is like no other office I’ve ever been in before. We got there around 9:30 this morning and the place was packed with people sitting and waiting, as well as two separate lines on opposite ends of the room.

The line on the right was for HEAP which Kara went to first. In case you aren’t familiar, HEAP is the Home Energy Assistance Program that gives qualified people help with their heating bills during the winter months. Kara had no idea that it even existed and if she qualifies it’ll help her tremendously. I can’t get HEAP this year since I don’t have my own home. I was instructed to take an envelope from the shelf next to the “teller” windows. One stack was for food stamps only and the other stack was for everything. I took from the latter.

I get a fat manilla envelope and go stand at the end of the line on the left side of the room. I had about 16 people in front of me so I knew I had plenty of time to fill out the application before I reached the front of the line. Inside this envelope was a stack of different papers and applications but the security guard had said the green/white application was the one I needed. I got to work filling it out while I stood there on line. It took me an hour to reach the front of the line.

When I finally got there I was asked, or, rather, instructed, “Next in line to window two.” So I moved up to window two where a lady took my application, asked me a question or two, made a copy of my application, and stamped both copies “Received”. She told me she’d made a copy of the app for the Medicaid Department and that they would send me an appointment letter in the mail; but that someone from the food stamp department would see me today. HUH?! Why not just do it all together like other States do? (I thought it, didn’t ask it.) Then she handed me a receipt thingy with the number 775 on it and told me to have a seat and wait to be called.

Kara, mind you, had already filled out the HEAP application and had been called to the back for an interview. It was 10:56a.m. and I was just sitting down to wait my turn. From past experience it should’ve taken no more than an hour for my number to be called. In this case, experience counted for nothing. Kara texted me and called me a couple of times from her interview because the intake person needed information about me since I live here too; then she was done. She said she was going to take Big Boy (her oldest son was home from school not feeling well so he was with us) outside to hang out in the car. That was at about 11:30.

At 12:00 she texted me to find out if I was still waiting. Yep. So she said she was going to take Big Boy to get some things done while they waited for me. Good enough. So I waited and waited and waited. My ass and back hurt terribly from the metal chairs in the waiting room. I chatted with two people for a couple of minutes and texted with Kara and “Dan” for a while. Kara had asked if I wanted anything and I’d said I was hungry. You can’t eat in those offices so she got me something from the deli but had to hold my food for me in the car until I was done. What was really irritating was that the case workers coming to the door to call people back for interviews had no rhyme or reason to their system of calling numbers – 735, 641, 106, 864, 1182, 392, 783…Are you fucking kidding me?! If they were calling numbers in order I would have some sense of when I’d be called; this way, though, I had no clue.

Finally, at about 1:30 I went back to the window and asked the same lady why it was taking so long for me to get called when I’d given my application in so long ago. She checked and went in back to find out what the delay was. She didn’t tell me the problem but did tell me it would be another ½ hour before I was called. FUCK!!! Ty was due to get off the bus at 2:20, Zach was due to get off his bus around 3:20 and Dolly had to be picked up in between. I called Kara to let her know so she immediately headed back home to wait for Ty. She called her boyfriend again to come home from work to wait for Zach and Little Boy while Kara and the two other boys went to get Dolly.

Meanwhile, as I was solidifying the pick-up arrangements with Kara on the phone, the case worker called my name; it was 2:00 – three hours after I’d submitted my application, and four hours since I’d arrived in the building. So I went back to do the intake interview and was stunned. In MO and MD, when the case worker is going over the application with you, they are also typing information into a computer; the interview takes about 20 minutes. Here in NY the case worker fills out one extra form – by hand, makes copies of your documentation, and is done. I waited three hours for a five-minute interview.

She explained a couple of things that I already knew, said she was going to make copies of my stuff and asked if I wanted anything from the food pantry. “Sure, thanks.” She came back with my originals, and two bags of groceries. Then I was done. Ready for the kicker? Kara had gotten Ty off the bus and was on her way to pick up Dolly. She wouldn’t get back to pick me up until 3:40, thereabouts; it was only about 2:10. I had an hour-and-a-half to kill so I took my bags of groceries, heavy bags, and walked ¼ mile back toward the aquarium. I didn’t go in but I did sit on the sidewalk near the driveway. First I bought a soda from the gas station next door, and then I settled myself in for the wait.

At least I had reading material; the fat manilla envelope had lots of stuff to read; all about my rights and responsibilities as a food stamp/Medicaid recipient. Woo Hoo!! If I hadn’t had it I might have gone nuts. The time passed semi-quickly, though, and Kara and Dolly were back for me before I knew it. She’d dropped the boys at home so they didn’t have to sit in the car any longer. It was just her and Dolly – and my sandwich. I was starving and that sandwich was awesome – chicken cutlet on a roll with mayo, Thousand Island dressing, Swiss cheese, bacon, onion, and lettuce. It had originally been warm but it was really good cold.

So I got my application in, got to walk a little for exercise (very little but still exercise), got my ride home, and had a tasty meal; not to mention that I know I’ll qualify for benefits. The meat of the day was pretty crappy, sitting there all day with nothing to do; but it ended up being really good and I’m happy about it. I know you are, too; thanks for your support and good wishes.

Until next time…peace to all.

Gettin' Things Done

I was going to write about my ex tonight and how he ticked me off, again, by trying to pull his macho, he-man bullshit. But I’m not going to. It’s not worth my time, effort, and stress level to rehash it. It’s done, I can’t change it, so I’ll just let it go. Instead I’ll try to talk about more positive things.

We got a lot done today, Kara and I. We went to Lowe’s and got some things we needed for the house and our organizing projects. We bought a row of hooks for the back of my bathroom door so I could hang the kids’ and my towels in a more accessible place to the shower. I installed them and can now reach my towel from the shower without getting the floor all wet. We also bought handles for the door that leads from the house to the garage. It’s a pocket door that won’t stay on track and the already-existing “handles” are the hardware that came with the door and are really hard to grip. I installed the new handles and now we can open the door with little-to-no effort. YEA!!

We also got shelf clips for my bookshelves. In the move some of them fell out so I didn’t have enough to get all the shelves in place. Today I did. Now I can get my books and all of our movies unpacked. I didn’t have time to do it earlier and I’d do it now but it’s really late. We have a couple of things to do tomorrow morning but I can definitely get started in the afternoon. It’s always exciting to make more room and to put things where they belong.

Then I get to spend tomorrow evening doing laundry so the kids have clean clothes to take to their dad’s house for the holiday. Wednesday we’ll spend a little time together before he comes to get them and then I’ll have plenty of time to get more of our stuff in order. With a lot of hard work I should have most of our stuff in order before they get back on Sunday; and Kara should be able to put her car in the garage again. I think I said that a day or so ago. I just can’t wait to get it done, though. Can you tell? I have to get it done, too, because it’ll be time for us to put up our Christmas stuff very soon. I need the room to do that.

I can even work on organizing and unpacking Thanksgiving day if I want to because, as I already mentioned, I’ll be here alone. I’ll get my MP3 player charged and I’ll be ready to go. With music playing and no interruptions, I can go all day. I do have to make some phone calls first, though. I’ll talk to the kids before they have dinner, and I’ll call a couple of friends to say “Happy Thanksgiving.” I haven’t had the time to call anyone lately so I’d like to at least call on the holiday.

I want to call Ellen to catch up a bit. She reads my blog so she’s caught up with me, for the most part, but I haven’t had the opportunity to catch up with her. I won’t be able to catch up too much on the holiday because she’ll be with her family but I do want to call and say a quick hello. I’ve got to call Joe who I’ve also missed recently, and probably one or two more people I haven’t gotten the chance to call recently. It sucks and I feel bad but I’ve got to get my home and my life in order; that’s a must. My friends all understand; they’ve been through hard times, too. Once things are more settled here I’ll have the time to sit and chat occasionally. I can’t wait for that either; I miss my friends.

So that’s that for this evening. Not much to talk about but I did get a lot of satisfaction with all the handy work I did today. It always makes me feel good when I get a lot accomplished. I love sitting back and enjoying the view. By the end of the weekend, the view around here should be fabulous. Right now, though, I’m going to bed to dream about all the positive things I’ll get done over the next few days; and all of the positive things coming my way once the clutter is gone. Ah, the joy of it all. I’m so happy for the kids and me. I know you are too.

Until next time…peace to all.

Pet Peeve #3 - I Think

Some of my worst pet peeves come from people in the supermarket. The reason I say this is because I went there today just to get a couple of things for dinner and some essentials. It should have only taken me about 15 minutes but it took longer because of the stupid shit I had to deal with while I was there. I’m not perfect and I never claimed to be; I’m sure I tick off people all the time, too. But whatever I’ve done is not the same crap that ticks me off at the store.

To begin with, why can’t the items in the store that belong together all be placed on the shelves together? I took Dolly to the store with me and the first stop was produce. We were on the hunt for bananas – found them; onions – found them; acorn squash – found them. The problems arose when we started looking for apples, broccoli crowns, and mushrooms – so many kinds of each all placed in different sections of the department. Three different kinds of apples were individuals and in the same aisle; the bagged, lower priced apples were all in a different aisle, and some were on an end cap even though they weren’t on sale.

The broccoli crowns were in the front of the department and the back of the department meaning that I had to look through both to see which were the fresher of the bunch. Then we couldn’t find any whole baby Bellas. We found some already cut, and dozens of whole white mushrooms in two different places. No whole baby Bellas anywhere. Buying them already cut is fine except that the price per pound is higher when the store does the work already. The sales guy told me that they don’t get new produce on Sundays so whatever was there was all they had. If they didn’t get a fresh delivery today why were they listing the broccoli crowns as “Fresh” when they obviously didn’t arrive today? Hmmm…

We got our produce and headed to find some hot dogs. There were lots of hot dogs all in the same place but they were blocked by some dude who was buying a butt-load of bacon. I’m guessing it was for some dish being made on Thanksgiving (I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt on that) but why did he have to park his cart in front of a section he wasn’t even searching? I had to stand there and wait for him to move because some lady was blocking the aisle in the other direction. We couldn’t reach the frozen juice for the same reason.

A lady pushing her two grandchildren in the tremendous cart with the two big red seats attached decided she wanted to peruse the frozen foods at the end of the aisle and left her cart, and grandchildren, parked across the entrance to the frozen food aisle. When I said “Excuse me” she looked at me, said, “Oh, I’m sorry” and pushed her cart in the exact direction I was walking, stopped to look at something in the frozen food section and parked her cart guess where – right in front of the frozen juice. Are you kidding me? Are people that oblivious to others that they can’t pay attention to what’s going on around them? Just like when I’m driving I spend my time looking all around me; when I’m shopping I do it to make sure I’m not holding up another shopper. Am I the only one who does that?

We got our goods and headed for the register. First things first – why are there self-check stations at stores today? I thought part of what I’m paying for goes to pay the salaries of the store employees. If I’m checking out my own groceries shouldn’t I get a discount? There’s no salary to be paid when there isn’t a cashier there. I went through a full serve register and left the self-serve registers for others today. I’ve used them in the past when I’ve had two or three items; I just thought I’d mention my issue with them tonight.

Anyway, we got on line, loaded our food, and waited for the people in front of us to complain about the ten cents they didn’t receive off an item that should have been on sale. It was TEN CENTS!!! Holy shit, I’ll give you the fucking dime if you’ll just shut up and be done. I didn’t say it but I sure was thinking it. They didn’t take the item, by the way, because it wasn’t on sale like they thought it was. They paid and left and thank goodness they paid with a bank or credit card. Had they pulled out a check my head might have exploded.

I got stuck behind a lady the other day who hadn’t bothered to make out the check before she got to the store so I got to wait for her to write out the check, recheck the amount, then write it in her check register before she finally put her crap in her pocketbook, gathered her receipt, and was on her way. Don’t do that!! If you’re going to write out a check and you know it ahead of time (some people don’t simply because they don’t know how much they’ll be spending) fill out the entire check before you walk into the store; leave only the amount areas blank. You know who the check is written to, you know the date, and you know your name; be ready when you’re on that line and stop holding up the rest of us.

We finally got out of the store after 45 minutes and headed home. I told you I hate shopping and that’s just a portion of why I hate it. I don’t like being around people who have no consideration for others. I think the next time I go shopping I’ll do some of the same things that are done to me and see how people like it. I doubt I will though because it’s no fun pissing off people for no reason. I just with others felt the same. Sometimes I wish magic was real and I could just zap up whatever I need. Since that won’t happen, though, I’ll have to deal with the bullshit that comes my way and try to smile through it. If I can’t smile, I’ll gripe to all of you. Just don’t get ticked off at me if you see yourself in my words; I just tell it like I see it.

Until next time…peace to all.

Tired, Bored and Dreading the Holidays

I didn’t write last night because I was exhausted by the time I got down here. We’re still organizing the house and we got a lot done yesterday although I can’t remember what. The day is just a blur to me. Today we got even more done but are now running into the we-can’t-do-this-until-we-do-that obstacle. We can’t get any more of my boxes out of the garage until we get some of her stuff out of the basement, but we can’t do that until we find two missing shelves and get the carpet in her sons’ room replaced.

We need the shelves to put in the wall unit to put some of her collectibles on display; and the carpet has to be replaced to move the extra boxes of toys from the basement to the boys’ room. We think the shelves may be in the garage but can’t find them because of all my boxes that are out there; and the carpet can’t be replaced for another couple of weeks. We’re stuck but neither of us can keep living out of boxes. Kara still hasn’t finished completely unpacking from when they moved into the house a year ago. I know what that’s like; I’m sure we all do. It’s just getting frustrating for both of us to not be able to get to all of our things when we need them. We’re getting by, though.

I still have to decide where to put my Christmas tree this year. I have barely any furniture here since I sold it all before I moved back in July and there is a lot of floor space. There isn’t a lot of wall space, though. All of the walls are taken so I’m not sure what to do with the tree. It’s supposed to go up in another week or so, so I need to get a lot of work done down here to make a space or to make it look less cluttered. Either way I’m sure it’ll all work out fine; it always does.

I just can’t believe Christmas is right around the corner. I really don’t like the holidays and if I didn’t have kids, I wouldn’t celebrate holidays at all. I don’t like all of the commercialism or the racing to get shopping done. Stores are putting Christmas items on the shelves earlier and earlier in the year now. Before you know it they won’t even take Christmas stuff down at all. I don’t like it that stores are opening at midnight after Thanksgiving dinner for people to get shopping started. What the fuck? I know people like the deals they get but what’s up with having to get up at 3:00 in the morning just to get the early-bird door busters?

I also don’t like holidays that dictate that I have to buy something for the people I love. I love my kids and I buy gifts for them all year long; I shouldn’t have to prove it to them on specified holidays because tradition says so. No, I don’t have to celebrate the holidays if I don’t want to but I also don’t want my kids being treated badly by others because of things like that. “You don’t celebrate Christmas? Why not? You’re weird!!” It is what it is and I can’t change it. I still don’t have to like it, though. And I really don’t have to like shopping. I really, really, really don’t like shopping, of any kind – but especially not around the holidays.

Kara and I decided that we’ll do our Christmas shopping online this year. She gets points and cash back from her Internet business if we shop from some of her affiliates. Walmart is one of those affiliates. The problem with that is that we have a special relationship, Walmart and I. I go in to spend $20 and I walk out after spending $150. It never fails. As long as I’m going there with someone else and not going shopping for myself, things are fine. Whenever I’m there to spend my own money, though, I just can’t stop myself. I love Walmart and all the bargains and I just can’t resist impulse shopping when I’m there. It sucks. Online is the best for me because I can’t see all the merchandise at the same time.

One place I never really had trouble was Dollar General and there isn’t one here in NY; and I’m bummed about that. In Independence I was at that store, at least, twice a week if not more often. I love that place as much as I love Walmart but Dollar General doesn’t take as much of my money in a single visit. It’s more manageable there. I’ll have to campaign to their headquarters to have them build some stores out my way. Yes, we have Family Dollar and Dollar Tree but it’s not the same. Dollar General is just better and always had what I needed when I needed it. {sigh} I miss my Dollar General. There was one in Maryland that I went to a couple of times but it was on the other side of town so I couldn’t go as often.

I don’t know. I guess the impending holidays are bumming me and I’ll stay this way until New Year’s Eve. It’s the holidays, all the work we’ve been doing around here, everything that still needs to be done…blah, blah, blah. When I sat down to write tonight I was in a perfectly good mood. Now, though, I’m just really tired and ready for bed. Maybe I shouldn’t have sat here watching “Hannah Montana” on the TV. I left it on for Dolly to go to sleep and she’s been asleep for a while now, I just haven’t turned off the TV. The more I watch, the more tired I get. So I guess I’ll quit griping for now and get some rest so I’ll be ready for whatever I can find to do tomorrow. Maybe a huge miracle will come along to help me get through the holidays, too. That would be nice but it would really have to be spectacular. I really have to stop now or I’ll just keep boring all of you. Tomorrow I should have something more fun to write about. Then again, maybe I won’t. You’ll just have to come back to find out, won’t you?

Until next time…peace to all.

Just a Mish Mosh

I had Ty’s parent/teacher conference today and got another glowing report. His teacher loves having Ty in his class and Ty is doing great at all of his work. He’s even above level in all aspects of Math and in his comprehension of Science. YEA!!! His teacher also said Ty’s a fabulous writer and artist and that the art teacher thinks so too. We all knew that, though. Zach’s my sports dude; Ty’s my artist/scientist; and I haven’t yet figured out Dolly, she’s all over the place right now.

Other than that I didn’t really do much today. I’m ticked off that my insurance company took a payment for a policy that I cancelled and won’t refund my money until all the paperwork is processed – about twenty days. I don’t think it’s right that they get paid on time, yet I have to wait for my money. What the fuck is up with that? Fuck the paperwork; it’s there in black and white that the policy was cancelled so I want my money. “I’m sorry, I understand your problem but there’s nothing we can do.” Uh, yea, there is something you can do. You took the money out of my account; all you have to do is reverse the charge and give it back, dumbass. Whatever.

That was my big beef for the day. I did forget something, though, on another topic. I told you I’d found those clothes on craigslist for Dolly, right? Well today Kara and I drove to Medford to look at them. The clothes are adorable and the lady was really nice. She gave us all 30 pieces for $10 instead of $15. That was a really nice surprise and so sweet of her. She also said she’d keep the email and contact us again when she’s got more of her daughter’s stuff to sell. I can’t wait. Dolly loved the clothes she got today so I know she’ll love whatever else comes her way.

Right now I’m having a really great conversation, via text messaging, with my friend Dan. You remember him from previous emails; I talked about him, his wife and their baby. Anyway, he texted me tonight and conversation went from general stuff to cold fusion, energy, and religion. Go figure. I’ve never discussed physics with anyone before but actually found it quite interesting. I’ll have to do a little research so I can converse better the next time. Learning is never a bad thing; and I try to impress that on my kids. I constantly tell them that we’re all always learning; they don’t like it but it’s true. Tonight I learned a few things about hydrogen and other things. That was pretty cool.

He and I didn’t get to finish the conversation because I wanted to get my blog done for tonight and I pinched the nerve in my right shoulder again today. All I did was yawn and I felt it pinch. I can turn my head all the way to the right, but I can’t turn it left nor can I tip it backwards without pain. OW!! So I’m stopping for tonight to lie down and relax. Maybe it’ll feel better tomorrow. It doesn’t usually go away that quickly but I could get lucky. We’ll see.

Until next time…peace to all.

Positive Is As Positive Does

Sun
sunshine
very hot
cool off in the pool
sunset

- Zachary Domanski

That is a poem written by Zach; they did it in class and it’s hanging on the bulletin board in the hall with the poems written by his classmates. When I went to his parent/teacher conference today I was reading it while I waited to speak to his teacher. I loved it so much I had to write it down so I could share it with everyone at home.

His teacher said he’s a pleasure to have in class and that he’s made a great transition into the classroom. He’s helpful, does all of his work, and has made lots of new friends. We need to work on the fluency of his reading, which I’ve told him before. He tends to just read the words without actually comprehending what the words are saying. Usually when he’s reading he’s in a rush to finish and go play. That will have to stop and I’ll have to work with him more on that. Otherwise he’s where he should be for only being in this school for a few weeks. I am very proud of him. Tomorrow is Ty’s conference and I’m sure I’ll be just as proud of him. I’m proud of all of my kids but it’s really heartwarming when their teachers, Dolly’s included, have such nice things to say about them.

Paul brought my van back today. I don’t know if I mentioned it yesterday but he came and took it and left me his truck for the day. He changed my breaks and did a full tune-up on it, among other things. There is a list of things he did but I can’t remember them all. He has to take it back in another couple of weeks because he couldn’t change all of the spark plugs, one oxygen sensor, and a belt without a lift. The parts can’t be reached from anywhere but underneath. He’ll borrow a friend’s garage and get the rest done.

What I don’t like is his truck. He drives a Chevy Blazer. There’s nothing wrong with that other than the fact that the seat doesn’t move up and I’m 2” shy of reaching the pedals. I had to take a cushion from the back of a living room chair to put behind me so I could drive it today. When the sun hit my eyes, even with my sunglasses on, I pulled own the visor to find that the mirror cover fell off and that elastic strap was stretched out and hanging in my face. I worked quickly to clear my view and was fine after that. Maybe next time he takes my van I’ll result to borrowing Kara’s car rather than taking Paul’s truck. That pillow thing isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, and I can’t drive with the sun blasting me in the face.

It was really nice of him to do all that work, though, and it didn’t cost me anything. It is handy to have a mechanic I know I can trust. Not many mechanics would screw up a vehicle they know their kids ride around in every day. He’s not always the greatest person but he does the right thing when it needs to be done. I have to give credit where credit is due. He deserves it this time.

Tomorrow I’m driving to Medford to buy Dolly some clothing off of Craigslist. She’s desperately in need of everything in her size so I looked and a woman is selling thirty items – all seasons, pants, shirts, skirts, shorts, and jackets – for $15. I can’t wait. Dolly doesn’t know yet but I’m sure she’ll be excited when she sees all her new stuff. The boys are set for a long time. A friend from MO was always giving me clothing for the boys. She had some for Dolly too but not much that would fit her since our daughters aren’t really close in size. The boys, though, have tons to spare. We’ll be weeding through their stuff over the next couple of days. I think I mentioned it last night.

I also realized that, since they’ll be with Paul from Wednesday to Sunday next week, I’ll have plenty of time to bring more boxes in from the garage and get my stuff organized without the kids under foot. Kara and her boys will be going to Jersey for Thanksgiving so I’ll have the entire house to myself. It’ll be the perfect day to get as much done as I can. I can’t wait. Kara will be able to get her car back in the garage again; and I won’t have to go out there every time I need something from a box. Granted, I won’t be able to bring everything in here but I can bring in what I can use on a daily basis. That’s very exciting for me.

The little things excite me, can you tell? Zach’s poem, getting to move my things into the house, getting my van tuned up, buying Dolly clothing…it’s a great feeling when positive things are in motion around me. I can feel the change in the atmosphere and I love it. I wonder what the Universe will be sending my way next. I’m sure it’ll be just as exciting even if it’s a little thing that most others would take for granted. I know it’ll be fabulous, though, and I can’t wait to share it with you.

Until next time…peace to all.

Nothing Exciting Today

Naps in Head Start may have to be banned – for Dolly, anyway. Since she started school she’s been taking a nap every day with her class and she’s been up late every night. It doesn’t matter if her nap is only 15 minutes or over an hour; she won’t go to sleep at bed time anymore. Maybe if the nap was early in the day it might not be such a problem; but they take naps around 1:00 in the afternoon and don’t get up until after 2:00. That’s too late for my kid to be sleeping during the day. I may be talking to her teachers very soon to have them give Dolly something else to do during nap time. Her being up this late is taking away my “me” time.

I did have “me” time today because the house was empty except for me. All the kids were in school and Kara had meetings again. What did I do during my free time today? I made breakfast (oatmeal), showered, found a recipe I needed for dinner tonight, found a fax number I need for tomorrow, and I sat on my bed watching a movie and folding laundry. I started the laundry right when I started the movie and both were done at the same time. That was nice, and all the laundry is folded and put away. Then it was almost time for the kids to start arriving home.

I was supposed to pick up Dolly but Kara didn’t think she’d make it back in time to be here for the bus. She tried calling a friend to see if she could be here but the friend wasn’t available. So Kara picked up Dolly and I stayed home waiting for the buses to arrive and to get all the boys started on homework. While I made dinner we were chatting and got simultaneous phone calls on two different phones from the boys’ schools. It was an automated reminder that the kids will be dismissed early for the rest of the week due to parent/teacher conferences. No biggie there but we can’t figure out why we should even bother getting the boys up to go to school at all.

See Ty and Kara’s oldest son (Big Boy) start school at 8:45 but are being dismissed at 10:45. Zach and Kara’s youngest son (Little Boy) start at 9:45 and are being dismissed at 11:45. What’s the point of any of the kids going for two hours each day? That makes no sense considering the conferences don’t start until noon. Yes, I understand the teachers need a break to get prepared; but then why not just make a day-and-a-half of straight conferences and let the kids attend school the other day-and-a-half? That would be the logical thing, right? I think so and Kara agrees. We don’t get it.

To top that, the automated message told us that next Tuesday all the kids will be dismissed at 2:15 for the Thanksgiving holiday. No problem right? No. The reason they’re being dismissed early, though, is for a “district wide emergency go home drill.” What the fuck is that? They actually have to practice dismissing the kids in case of an emergency? Haven’t they done that before? It’s a procedure in case of inclement weather or other such emergency where schools have to be closed in the middle of the day. But why the need for a drill? I guess there is some sort of procedure the kids have to follow in school but I don’t know what it is. Maybe I’ll ask the boys’ teachers at the conferences.

I’m thinking that, with the boys home early for the next three days, I won’t be getting much done around here. I’ll do some more organizing down here and see if I can’t get a few more boxes unpacked and maybe some pictures hung. I don’t know. It all depends on how they’re behaving and how many times they interrupt me. I do know that we’ll be going through their dressers to weed out the old and don’t fits. I couldn’t even get Ty’s clean clothes in his dresser because they’re so full. His clean stuff is stacked neatly on top of the piano in their room. Yes, they have a full-sized piano. It’s a player piano and it came with the house when Kara bought it. It also can’t be moved because it’s heavier than all get out. But it makes a nice show piece and it’s great for stacking clean laundry. If I had the money, I’d get it tuned and would play a little. I took some piano back in school and remember some. Maybe one of the kids would even want to learn it. Who knows?

So that’s that. I had a day to myself and spent it doing laundry. How nice for me. I think that, next time I know I’ll have some free time, I’ll do all my chores early and spend the rest of the day doing nothing. Maybe, maybe not; I can’t tell right now. The kids will be gone next week. They’re going to their dad’s for Thanksgiving. They’ll be gone from Wednesday evening to Sunday afternoon. What will I do with myself? I don’t really know but if I think of something exciting, I’ll let you know. Right now my brain is too tired to think about it so I’ll let you stop reading and I’ll go find something else to do.

Until next time…peace to all.

Driven to Confusion

I know things happen for a reason but does that go for little shit, too? This morning started out as it always does. The kids and I got up at about the same time, just before my alarm sounded. The boys got dressed and ready to go right away; Dolly had to be coaxed a little. I have to leave the house to get Dolly to school before Ty’s bus arrives to I gave him a big hug and kiss before I left. Zach didn’t want a hug and kiss yet because I usually make it back to the house with about two minutes to spare before he gets on his bus.

So I get Dolly to school at about 8:10 and she asks me to stay and help set up for breakfast. We put the chairs at the tables and passed out the cereal containers, spoons, napkins and milk. She sat down to eat and I gave her a hug and kiss and left. I was leaving her school a few minutes behind schedule but figured I could still make it back home to see Zach before he left if I just pushed the speed limit a bit. I pulled out of the parking lot right behind a big pick-up truck. In front of him was – OH GOOD GRIEF – a bulldozer!! A huge yellow ten-mile-an-hour bulldozer was leading the pack.

I figured it would be okay if he would just turn off onto one of the other roads but that was not happening. He was following the path I use to get home; so far, anyway. I called Kara to explain what was happening and asked her to give Zach a big hug and kiss from me in case I didn’t get there before the bus did. Still behind the bulldozer I waited until I got to the light where I could go one of two ways. Whichever way he was going, I was going the other. He decided to go straight so I made the right and landed right at the train tracks as the gate was going down. I got to sit there and watch the ten-mile-an-hour train go rumbling past and finally got to continue on my way.

I made it back to the main road and headed home, still trying to make it before the bus. About two minutes later Kara texted me a message telling me to take my time, she was driving the boys to school. I still wanted to see if I would have beat the bus so I just continued at a steady pace until I got home. I would have made it in time for the goodbye kiss and hug but today the bus was late anyway; it was a different driver. Kara was driving them because Zach had asked her, right after I called, if she would drive them since she’d driven Ty and her other son to school last week. Fair enough.

So that was that, or so I thought. I forgot that Ty had an afterschool thing to do today and that I’d have to pick him up at 3:45. Kara and I ran a few errands and got home about ten minutes before I had to leave to pick up Dolly. I get her around 3:15 and had to be back to get Ty, also. Kara told me to call her and she’d go get him if need be, but that would be tight since the second bus drops off our younger boys at 4:00. See the need to get a bus for Dolly? Anyway, I headed out to get her and was almost to her school when traffic had to stop to let a monstrous construction truck pull across the road to back up into the area where the work was being done. We got to sit and watch the ten-mile-an-hour behemoth block traffic during its maneuvers. So I got to Dolly’s school about 3:05 and we said a quick goodbye to her teachers and we were off to get Ty.

At the light where I’d made the right that morning when the bulldozer went straight, I actually went straight since the right turn would have put me smack in the middle of a traffic jam. We were doing fine until the lady in front of me decided to stop and let two people out of a parking lot. I had people behind me honking but there wasn’t anything I could do. When the lady had her fill of dishing out kindness she finally moved and we got to sit at a long red light. She continued to poke along in front of everyone for a few miles and finally turned so the rest of us could continue. The drive was really smooth after that and we actually got to Ty’s school 15 minutes early. Go figure.

So what was the meaning of all my delays today? I don’t know so I was hoping one of you could clue me in on it. I didn’t get anywhere late; I actually arrived early at all of my destinations. I still can’t figure out what lesson I was supposed to learn from having all the slow-moving vehicles in front of me today, though. Maybe it’ll come to me in a dream; maybe someone will tip me off; maybe I’ll never find out. If you think of anything, please pass it along; and if I figure it out I’ll do the same. In the meantime we’ll all just have to wait for the answer, if we ever get one. I would be nice but if it doesn’t happen, so be it. I just don’t like being in the dark. Please turn on the lights for me, if you think you can. I’d really appreciate it. Thanks.

Until next time…peace to all.

They Don't Make Houses Like They Used To

The kids and I had some time alone today because Kara’s kids were with their dad and she was spending some time with her mom before picking up the kids. I wanted to find something to do with the kids and came across two bags of stuff their grandmother had sent home with them. They were Halloween things and I totally forgot about them. I had put them up on a shelf when the kids brought them home because I didn’t want the other two kids to feel bad about not having them. Since we were alone today it was time to do the activities.

One was a mesh bag with three small stenciled pumpkins, some paints and a brush. We gathered a couple more brushes and the kids got to paint their pumpkins. They came out looking great and are sitting on the front porch with the other pumpkins we gathered before the holiday. The second bag contained a gingerbread house kit with Halloween colored icing, one black and one orange; and Halloween candy: candy corns, black and orange jelly beans, pumpkin gumballs and sprinkles. I’d never built a gingerbread house before so this would be a challenge. I have to tell you, flipping the refrigerator and freezer doors was easier.

I was reading the directions on the back of the box and they said to pipe a little icing around the base of the included tray. That was easy enough. Then they said to lay out the pieces of the house and line the edges with icing. This was the first problem. The instructions said the icing should go around the inner edge of the pieces. I did that. Then, when I went to assemble the first two walls, the icing was not in the correct place to hold the pieces together. It should have gone around the perimeter of the pieces so when the corners touched the icing would stick them together. I got a butter knife and rearranged the icing so it was in place to do its job.

I had icing all over my fingers and was trying not to get it all over the walls, and I did a pretty good job. Then I put the first two walls together. They held. Then I rearranged the icing on the other two walls. When I went to put the third wall up I realized the tray that was included wasn’t big enough to hold all the pieces properly. It was just a little too short on each side and I had to really push the pieces together to make them fit. I thought they were going to break, but they didn’t. I still had icing all over my fingers though. It was as sticky as toothpaste and didn’t wipe off very easily with a rag. I was washing my hands constantly.

Once the house was assembled we had to wait 15 minutes for it to set before we could decorate it. So, we waited. These things are supposed to be fun, right? If you say so. After 15 minutes I called the kids back to decorate. That’s when I realized that our house would never look as cool as the one on the box. First of all, they didn’t give us enough orange icing to decorate with once we had all the walls to the house stuck together. The orange was the one it said to use for that purpose and it was, pretty much, gone by that point. We had a lot of black, though.

I outlined the windows, the door and the roof in the black, and put a few shingles on the roof, too. That’s when I noticed the orange that was holding the walls and roof together was “leaking” and falling to the tray. Not enough to make the house fall apart, but enough to cause a mess. I tried taking some on my finger and smearing it on the door, inside the black outline. Yea, that was the thing to do. Once it’s on your finger it’s not coming off again; not easily anyway. Then the icing on the edges of the roof began slipping off so we had to smear it on again.

I told the kids to grab a candy and start decorating – quickly. Zach chose the candy corn and put them in a line along the middle of the roof, then he stuck some on the icing shingles. Ty did the same with the pumpkin gumballs and Dolly put on the jelly beans. I asked Ty to run and get my camera so I could take a picture of our remedial creation, which didn’t look all that bad considering the instructions sucked and we didn’t have enough material to do it properly. Just as I was about to take a picture we noticed the candy corns on the top of the roof were disappearing into the house. The roof was ever-so-slightly sliding off the house. I’m guessing Zach pushed a little too hard when he put then on there and jarred the roof loose.

I sat down to take a picture and got one good one. Then I decided to turn on my flash to see if I could get a better one. That’s when the roof started really sliding. I pushed it back up and it stayed long enough for me to get one more shot. Then it was finished; it totally slid off the house. Just that one side, though; the rest of the house stayed together just fine. I’d already told the kids they could eat some of the house when we were finished building it, and a piece of roof was just fine. I took a knife and cut it into four pieces and we all enjoyed our creative treat. It was sticky, messy, and the kids had black lips from the icing; but it tasted great and we all had a blast working on it.

Maybe next time we’ll try a Christmas house. I’ll just make sure I buy extra supplies and that it’s completely dry before we decorate it. Whatever happens to it, though, the kids and I will get to spend some fun, quality time together; and our gingerbread house will taste great regardless of what it looks like when it’s done.

Until next time…peace to all.

Chores and Other Stuff

I really need to start blogging earlier in the day. Lately I’m staying up late watching TV or playing a game and, by the time I get to bed, I’m too tired to sit here and remember what happened during the day. I like doing this, I just can’t stay awake long enough to get it done. I’ll figure something out.

So yesterday Ty made his diorama. He did it mostly by himself; I wrapped the box in wrapping paper to cover the orange color and Nike logo. He drew it out on paper (at my suggestion) and then redrew the different pieces on cardboard, colored them, cut them out and glued them inside the box. It looks great. He decided to do an urban community and it’s got the Statute of Liberty, the now-gone Twin Towers, the Empire State building, and a couple of other buildings from other countries. I don’t know why; please don’t ask. I’ve got pictures of it, I just haven’t uploaded them yet. I’ll try to do that tomorrow.

I’ve been busy during the days getting chores and things done around here; just organizing, unpacking, reorganizing and other things. Yesterday I actually switched the doors on the refrigerator. Kara’s kitchen doesn’t really have the most convenient layout so, after she and I talked and rearranged a few things, we decided that the fridge and freezer doors, that opened from the counters out toward the room (left to right), should be flipped so that they could open toward the counters.

Picture this: you’re standing at the counter doing whatever, and your spouse wants a drink from the fridge. The problem is that you’re standing right next to the handle to the door so your spouse either has to wait for you to finish, or you have to step out of the way while the drink is fetched. Not really the best plan. With the doors opening from the opposite direction you can continue to stand there doing what you’re doing and your spouse can get to the fridge to get a drink, a snack, or whatever he or she wants, without disturbing you or having to wait.

I knew the doors could be flipped; I’d just never done it before. This was my first door flipping and, I must say, it was rather enjoyable. I love doing repair-type work, or anything where I get to build something. The only bump is that I had to remember which parts went where when I got both doors off. I took off the freezer first because it’s the smaller of the two and the most logical. Once I got the freezer door off and the handle moved to the other side I couldn’t reinstall it until the fridge was flipped also because the freezer door sits on a peg from the top of the fridge door. Imagine that.

So I got the fridge door off and the handle flipped; then I got it reinstalled. I got the freezer door back on soon after and they both worked and sealed properly; plus I had no spare parts. Then came the kicker. I’d removed all the shelves from the fridge door, and I’d even put them on the table in the same layout they were in inside the fridge. What I didn’t note was which notches they’d been on in the fridge. I had to play shuffle the shelves to get them back to the correct heights they’d been. All in all, though, it was a pretty satisfying project and I had a great time doing it. If you decide to take on the same project at some point remember to work quickly; the food does begin to defrost while it’s sitting there waiting for you.

I don’t know what chores are in store for tomorrow but I hope to find something fun and productive. Not that most chores aren’t productive but I get a better sense of accomplishment when I have to take things apart and put them back together. Not Tim Allen-style; I don’t rebuild things to work better and faster. I just like working on hands-on projects; it’s actually fun for me. Maybe I’ll hang pictures or something, I don’t know yet. You can bet, though, that whatever I pick, I’ll have a blast doing it.

Until next time…peace to all.

Diorama Dilemma

The kids were off from school today and I kept thinking it was Saturday all day long. It was a long day, too, because it was a battle to get the boys to clean their room. It also took them hours to do it and Kara ended up helping them finish because my frustration level was just off the charts. I was also trying to get dinner made (I made my fabulous beef stew – yummy) between cleaning tasks.

After dinner I was helping Ty study for his vocabulary and spelling tests tomorrow and came across a project information sheet from Ty’s teacher. Guess what!! We have our first at-home school project. They’re studying different communities and Ty has to make a diorama or either an urban, suburban, or rural community. Want to know something else? I have no clue how to make a diorama. I know it gets made in a shoebox, of which I have none, but other than that, I’m totally lacking in diorama knowledge.

Tyler will have a blast doing it but I’m not sure I can help him. I don’t think I can handle the third-grade diorama dilemma. I guess I can Google instructions and help him gather supplies; but he’ll do the rest of the work himself. He’s a better artist than I am and he’s a lot more creative so I’ll have to ask him to plan what he wants and I’ll do my best to help. One thing I forgot to consider when having kids is that I’ll have to go through grade school, middle school and high school all over again.

I don’t recall ever making a diorama in grade school but I may have. I did lots of projects, some that I can remember, but this one is completely new to me. I want to know why they have to make a diorama anyway. Why can’t they just draw the community of choice rather than having to build it? If one of Ty’s classmates is aspiring to be an architect, engineer, or contractor, let that kid make a diorama; let the rest of them do something easier so we moms don’t have to stress over it.

Okay, I’m not really stressing because it’s not my project but I’m sure Ty will ask for my help at some point and then I might stress. I’m afraid that, if I try to help, I’ll screw up his project. I’m definitely going to make sure he gets it started over the weekend so he can take his time and not be rushed at the last minute. It’s not due until the 22nd but I’m not taking any chances. Maybe if he does a little bit every day he’ll get it done with time to spare. That’s where I come into the project; that I can handle, a little nudging every now and again.

It’s also a little exciting when I think about it. My Ty is in third grade and has his first real project. He’s such a big boy now. I know, he’s only nine but I can still remember his first day of Head Start. He was standing next to me the other day and looked really tall. I don’t want him to grow up because that means I’m getting older. But I guess I can’t control it so I’ll just go with the flow. At least I get to relive my childhood through him and I bet our diorama will be fabulous. I’ll post pictures of Ty’s great work after it’s done.

Until next time…peace to all.

The Sounds of Silence

Did you hear the silence today? I was in the house without another human being for five-and-a-half hours. Of course the three cats and two dogs were still here but that was okay; they weren’t whining or talking or fighting or making noise at all. Kara had meetings all day so she took Dolly to school and then headed to wherever it was she needed to be. I got the first set of kids on their bus at 8:15 and 45 minutes later got the second set of kids on their bus. That’s when the silence set in – loud and clear. I didn’t know what to do first.

I went to the kitchen to get some breakfast but, just as I was about to put my English muffin in the toaster, I decided to shower first. I didn’t have anyone knocking on the door or talking through it to ask me questions about things that could just as easily wait until I was done. I got to shower and dress in peace; and I never felt the need to rush. That was great. Then I headed back upstairs to eat my breakfast. While my muffins were toasting I got some other stuff done and even got a couple of things in the mailbox to go out today. This was stuff that should have been done last week but couldn’t get done because of the chaos that was going on around here.

After I finished those couple of things and ate my breakfast, I headed down here to my computer to get Ty’s birthday pictures uploaded, edited, and posted on Facebook. I got to do that without interruption, too. I was even listening to music on Winamp while I worked. I turned the music up really loud and sang along, too, and not one kid complained about it. Know why? Because they weren’t here!!! I was listening to John Denver so I’m sure they would have asked me to shut if off had they been here.

Since I was listening to John I decided, after my pictures were done, to go upstairs and use Kara’s computer to watch some videos of him on Youtube. I could have stayed down here but I thought I should enjoy the common areas while I had the chance. So I made a cup of hot chocolate and watched John for a while. I was having such a good time that I made a second cup of hot chocolate and watched some more videos. Then I had to do something else. It was a toss up between taking a nap and playing video games. The video games won.

There would never be a better time to have the Wii (Kara’s, I don’t have one) all to myself. Her kids don’t have a lot of games so I played their mini golf game. It was fun but hard; I’m surprised the kids can play it at all. Some of the courses I had to play over and over because I kept going too far over par to get any score. Before I knew it I had to stop playing and get ready to pick up Dolly from school. I had to wait for Kara’s boyfriend to get here first, though.

Remember last night we discussed conflicting schedules and all that? Well, that’s what happened today. Kara was going to pick up Dolly after her second meeting but her first meeting got rescheduled for a time after the second meeting. She wouldn’t be able to pick up Dolly so I had to, but then we didn’t have anyone here to get the first two boys off their bus. Kara’s boyfriend had to leave work and come home to be here for the boys so I could go get Dolly. When I got back with her, the boyfriend had to leave to go to a networking something-or-other. It sucks not having a bus for Dolly.

We called transportation for the school district but they don’t have any way to help us. I’ll have to do more research to see if I can find anything. Driving her back and forth sucks but I have no other choice right now. At least it’s just for the rest of this year. Next year she’ll be in Kindergarten so she’ll definitely be on the bus. Anyway, that’s not what my topic was for tonight. I was so relaxed and stress-free all day that I forgot to clean the freezer and go to the hardware store. They just flew right out of my head when the silence clobbered me. Oh well, I can always do them tomorrow. Kara will be home so it won’t be quiet here; she’s as loud as I am. We’ll probably just go together; after food shopping, that is. At least I got to have one really peaceful day. I may get one again next Tuesday. I’ll let you know.

Until next time…peace to all.

Dolly School Day

First things first; waking up to rain is one thing, waking up to snow and rain is another. The snow didn’t stick and there wasn’t a lot of it; it was just falling, mixed with the rain. I didn’t order the snow and I don’t want it. Wouldn’t it be great if we could vote on whether we want snow in the winter or not? I’d definitely campaign on the side of 75 and sunny all year ‘round. Thank goodness the ugly weather didn’t last very long this morning because it was Dolly’s first day of school here in NY and we were both pretty nervous.

Nothing was confirmed about school until this past Friday and Dolly wasn’t all that thrilled to be going again. She’s been all alone with me every day since we got here and just doesn’t want to give up her mama. I was dreading this morning since we found out she’d be starting because I figured there would be a fight over getting up and getting dressed. It wasn’t too bad but there was some resistance. We had to leave before the boys got on the bus and most mornings I won’t be able to put Ty on the bus. Dolly has to be at school when Ty is getting on the bus; but Zach doesn’t get on until 45 minutes later so I should be able to be here for him. Then I have to leave to pick up Dolly just before Ty gets home.

It really sucks not having a bus for Dolly because it’s a waste of gas for me, and because Kara and I have to make sure one of us is here when the boys get off the bus. Why don’t schools think of issues like this when schedules are made? And why doesn’t the Federal Government (the funding agency of Dolly’s school) consider such issues when deciding what to keep and what to cut from the Head Start budget? If I were living in my own place, I’d be screwed. As it is, we’re trying to decide the best person to take Dolly to school tomorrow morning – Kara or me. Kara has things to do all day tomorrow so we have to work our schedules to where she gets to her meetings and errands, Dolly gets to and from school, and someone is here to meet the buses when the boys get home. It’s a bit confusing for a second day of school. We’ll figure something out; no doubt.

What I was originally going to talk about, though, was Dolly’s first day. I got her to the school right on time but she wouldn’t let go of my hand for anything. We walked around the classroom with her lead teacher to see where everything was and then she washed her hands to get ready for breakfast. She was really overwhelmed because there were so many parents there helping their kids get ready to eat. That’s never been the case before; most of the parents would just drop off their kids and go.

So she took a little seat and I helped her open her cereal and put milk on it but she wouldn’t eat. I had to feed her the first couple of bites; she was almost afraid to move. I felt so sad for her. Then she started to cry which, of course, caused me to shed a couple of tears. I sat on the floor next to her chair and she put her little head on my shoulder and cried softly. I talked to her about what a fun time she was going to have and how she’d make new friends but she wasn’t buying it. Then her teacher sat with us and talked to the other kids at the table about what they did over the weekend. When she asked Dolly about her weekend, Dolly told how she celebrated Ty’s birthday twice and had cake and ice cream two times. That seemed to cheer her up a bit but she still wouldn’t let go of my hand.

We had “free time” while the other kids finished up eating; all the kids do, once they’re finished eating. Then her teacher rearranged the job board and Dolly gets to be the line leader for the week. That’s pretty much so she can be near the teacher and feel a little more comfortable. She was happy about that but not about me having to leave. They were lining up to go play in the gym; with the weather the way it was they couldn’t go outside today. I explained that I’d have to leave when they went to play but she didn’t look happy. So I gave her a few kisses and hugs, and a kissing hand to keep my kiss safe in case she needed it later. They went off down the hall and I came home.

When I returned later to get her I was told that she did great and it was like she’d always been there. I found that hard to believe because I knew she’d probably been asking for me during the day. I was right; one of her teachers said Dolly misted up a few times and asked when I’d be there to get her. That sounded more like Dolly on a first day of school. When she saw me standing in the classroom door she came over, jumped into my arms, and hugged onto me really tight. When I asked how her day was she just stared at me. I had to ask questions to find out what they did and she brightened up some on the way home but she wouldn’t talk to anyone here when they asked her how her day went.

When I told her that Kara might be taking her to school tomorrow she was okay with it. She’s excited to be able to show Kara her classroom. Maybe it would be better if Kara takes her so she won’t be so clingy. We’ll see. It just breaks my heart to see her so sad and scared; I wish there was some sort of mommy magic to take the hurt away, regardless of the situation. I do know that Dolly will be fine after a few days of school. She’s my social butterfly and makes friends wherever she goes. Before I know it she’ll be talking up a storm about all of her little classmates and the fun things they do during the day. I’ll make sure to pass along all the pleasantries; I’m sure she’d like to know that all of you are smiling with her.

Until next time…peace to all.

Ex Disappointment Again

Today is Ty’s birthday; he turned nine. My big boy is nine years old today and he isn’t home. For the first time in his life he’s not spending his birthday with me. My ex wanted to pick up the kids today so they could celebrate Ty’s birthday with him. I couldn’t really deny him because he hasn’t spent a birthday with any of the kids since 2005. I’m still a little sad, though. Yes, we’ll be celebrating Ty’s birthday here with him tomorrow when he gets home, but I’ve never spent his birthday away from him, even if we didn’t actually celebrate on the exact day. Him not being here isn’t what’s really bothering me, though. What’s bothering me is my ex.

On Halloween, he texted me asking if he would be able to get the kids this weekend for Ty’s birthday. I think I mentioned that. I agreed and we settled on 2:00 as the pick-up time; he even confirmed it with me a couple of days ago in a text. I did a few things around the house, threw in a load of laundry to make sure they had clean clothes to take with them, and I took Ty to the store to pick out his birthday cake so we could order it for tomorrow. We got home, all the kids had lunch and I had my kids shower before their dad arrived. At 2:00 Ty and I were standing by the front door goofing off when the phone rang. It was my ex and Ty answered the phone.

I stood there and watched as Ty’s face went from excitement to disappointment in a split second. No, my ex wasn’t cancelling on the kids, but he was going to be late. He was just leaving work and had to go home and change before heading here to get the kids. He’s an hour away, mind you. I felt so bad for Ty; I wish I could describe what he looked like when his dad said he’d be late. It broke my heart. There was a stereo on in the corner of the room and I wanted to cheer up Ty so I grabbed him and danced with him. It worked; he felt better and was laughing before I knew it.

So we hung out for another hour just laughing and playing and Ty wanted to wait outside. Zach and Dolly decided to wait outside also so I took their overnight bag and sat on the porch with them while they played. I had my cell phone there to check the time and before I knew it 3:00 was there but my ex wasn't. Zach, not knowing what time it was, said, "Dad said he'd be here at 3:00." I just agreed that he did say 3:00. He finally arrived at 3:35 although the kids have no idea what time it was when he pulled into the driveway. I got not a word from him saying that he was on his way or running late or anything.

What really ticks me off is that the kids and I did what we had to do to get them ready and not only did their dad not have the courtesy to call sooner, but this isn’t the first time he’s been late. When we were in Independence and he was over in Lenexa he was late all the time. Most times he didn’t even bother to call and it got to the point that I wouldn’t tell the kids he was coming until he called me from down the block. I hope I don’t have to start doing that again. It just seriously bugs me that he doesn’t have a lick of common sense when it comes to things like that.

These are his kids and he’s now got the chance to see them occasionally. You’d think he’d make the effort to do the right thing instead of starting to fuck things up so early in their newly-rejuvenated relationship. I really shouldn’t even be upset over it. He was always late and he’ll always continue to be late; and he’ll continue to fuck up until the kids just don’t want to be bothered anymore. He won’t be able to blame that on me, either, because the kids are old enough to speak for themselves. I just feel bad for the kids; they shouldn’t have to keep putting up with his bullshit but it’s something that can’t be avoided. Us being in MO and not having to deal with this crap (and I know it’ll get worse) may have been easier, but being closer to my ex gives the kids a chance to see what he’s really like; it’s not all vacations and gifts the way it has been for the past few years.

It is what it is. I can’t change it, nor can I control him. I’m just going to accept it and move on with my life. Sure, I’ll be here occasionally bitching and griping about him, but that’s part of what this blog is for. In the meantime, I’m going to try to focus on the positive things that are going on and I’ll do my best to help the kids get past any hurdles they come up against. I’ll help them and you’ll help me. That’s the way it works.

Until next time…peace to all.

A Great Day in the Books

I definitely had a good day today. Joe decided to come over for a visit; third time in a month. Oh happy day!! Kara, Joe and I cleaned out the fridge and had some great laughs in the process. I don’t think he was expecting to be doing any cleaning but he pitched in anyway. Then we had to straighten up a little bit because Dolly was getting to meet her teacher today. I don’t think I mentioned that I got a phone call from the Head Start on Tuesday saying that they have an opening for her. Another oh happy day!!

Her teacher had to make a home visit and fill out a little bit of paperwork before Dolly could start school. Kara and Joe hung out and watched TV while Dolly and I met with her teacher. Dolly chatted with her and even read a book with her. She was too cute and said she was excited to be going to school. When I asked her if she’d be okay with me dropping her off, she looked a little sad so I know she’ll probably cry the first couple of days; but she’ll be fine soon enough. Bonus for me: she gets to start on Monday. Dolly will be in school from 8:15 to 3:15 every day. That means free time for me to get some things done and possibly find some kind of work. YEA!!

Anyway, after Dolly’s teacher left, Joe left too and the boys all began arriving home from school. Homework was done by all; dinner was eaten, as was dessert later in the evening. Then the kids went to bed and I texted back and forth with a friend from MO. He’s the sweetest thing. Remember “Dan” from a previous post? He was my text buddy this evening. We talked about, pretty much, everything over the course of a couple of hours. Then my phone began to die and he was heading to bed so we said good night; but not before we’d had some really good discussions. He’s really easy to talk to and we agreed we’d talk again sometime.

After that I decided to hook up my Netflix account to Kara’s Wii so we’d be able to watch movies whenever we want. I couldn’t get it to work at first because I thought we needed a USB cable and we didn’t have one. Then she was talking to a friend of hers, an IT geek, who told us that the Wii can actually connect wirelessly. That was too cool. He stayed on the phone with Kara while I walked through the steps of getting the connection set up and the Netflix downloaded. I got the code, poked it in on my Netflix account on the computer and we were good to go. The menu popped up right before our eyes. Now that was just awesome (to use a seriously-overused word) and we couldn’t wait to see what was available for us to watch.

It was really late, though – after 11:30 – so we weren’t going to watch a movie. I started flipping through the comedy shows and came across Louis CK’s standup. Kara had never seen him before so I put it on for us. We laughed until we cried. He’s hilarious so if you ever want to watch someone really funny, Louis CK is the man. Give him a listen; you won’t be disappointed. We didn’t finish watching it, though, because it got really late so we just decided to stop it and finish watching it tomorrow. That means to me that tomorrow, or today as it may be (it’s almost 1:00 in the morning), will be another fantastic day. I’m going to get some sleep so I’ll be prepared when my alarm goes off in another few hours. Maybe it’ll be even better than today was. I hope your day is wonderful, too.

Until next time…peace to all.

Fun Phone Calls

I was supposed to get a child support payment last night but it wasn’t in my account this morning. It really ticked me off since I’ve got things to do with that money. I called the Missouri Child Support Enforcement number this morning, something I’ve done dozens upon dozens of times to change my address and check on the payment. The girl I spoke to wasn’t very pleasant, I must say. Maybe it was because I called as soon as the office was open for calls. It’s an 866 number and they begin taking calls right at 7:00 in the morning. I called at 7:00:01 so I’m pretty sure she wasn’t ready to be dealing with me, and I was the pleasant one on the phone.

She took the information to change my address and phone number but when I asked her where my payment was all she said was that it was currently being processed so she couldn’t tell me exactly where it was. I could only assume that it would be disbursed to me today so I’ll have it for tomorrow. I really wanted to ask her why they have no way of knowing when my money will be released to me. I don’t really think it’s fair that the State can release my money when it feels good and ready yet the employees get paid on a regular basis.

Perhaps once a month the paychecks for the people who create the system of payment disbursement should be late and doled out randomly so the employees will know what it feels like for the rest of us. When their money is late and they have bills to pay, they’ll understand that this system they have going isn’t all it’s cracked up to be and they’ll change things a bit so that we custodial parents get our money one a regular basis rather then whenever the State decides to release it. I doubt it’ll happen but it would really be nice.

Later in the morning Kara was on the phone with the NYS DMV to get information for the both of us. She needs to get her address changed on her license and registration; and I need to get a NYS license as well as get my van tagged. The line was busy for a while and when it finally rang it was the usual automated crap asking her to push every number possible just to get the info we need. Then she was put on hold waiting for the next customer service representative. She’d asked me if criminals were the ones answering the phones these days. I believe they are but couldn’t confirm it with any conviction (no pun intended). She was getting tired of being on hold and said, “It was never like this. It used to be that you called and immediately got a criminal.” I know it doesn’t sound funny like this but if you’d been sitting here you’d have laughed as hard as I did.

The guy who finally answered the call was really nice and fun to talk to; even though Kara was doing all the talking I could tell the conversation was fun. I was even laughing at some points just from what she was saying to the guy. At one point she muted the phone and asked me if she should ask him if he gets conjugal visits. (More laughter.) She was busy writing down the info we needed and, at one point, he told her he’d transfer her to another department to change her address over the phone. She asked if she’d get disconnected or be put on hold for a long time. Then it was my turn to chime in. I quietly told her that all he had to do was hand the phone to the guy on the top bunk. She couldn’t stop laughing then. Yes, we were having a bit of fun, but the guy never had a clue; and don’t tell me you’ve never done it because I know you have.

Anyway, we got all the info we needed and found out that I can get my license changed immediately but can wait until my MO registration expires before I have to change it. They’d prefer I do it sooner but since I don’t have the funds right now waiting is an option and I won’t get into any trouble for it. That was good to know. I do have to get my license changed, though, because I can’t even open a bank account here in NY without a NYS picture ID. What the fuck is that all about? I got one in MD just by Ellen giving me a letter that said I was living in her house. Over here they won’t accept a letter because, “Anyone can give you a letter.” Guess what!! I’m not anyone.

So one of the things we have to do over the next couple of days is get my license changed back to a NY license and what’s really funny is that the DMV doesn’t require proof of address; just proof of identity. That makes no sense to me at all. A government agency doesn’t care where I live as long as I am who I say I am, yet a bank requires me to prove I live here. That’s as ass-backwards as anything can be. Whatever. I’ll get the license and will then get the bank account. It is what it is and there’s nothing I can do about it. So be it. Just thought I’d fill you in on the nonsense I had to deal with today. I’m sure there’s more to come so I’ll be prepared for it when it happens; as prepared as I can be, anyway.

Until next time…peace to all.

Movies and Other Things

I got up this morning and had Ty get ready for school. As I entered the kitchen he tells me, “We don’t have school tomorrow, Mom.” HUH!? I turned to Kara who gave me a bewildered look. Then Ty reminded us that tomorrow is Election Day. My kids never had off from school on Election Day before because in MO they keep the schools open. If the school is a polling station they have a designated area for voting – usually the gym – and staff and volunteers keep the hallways free of outsiders by directing voters to the proper location and immediately out of the buildings. I’m wondering why they can’t do that here. Whatever, I can’t change it. So we’ve got a house full of kids tomorrow even though they were just at home for the weekend. That’s okay; Joe’s coming for a visit tomorrow so the kids will all be happy.

Tonight, I got to relax. Kara and I made some tea, grabbed some Halloween candy, and watched “Little Voice.” It’s an awesome, awesome movie starring Jane Horrocks as LV, a shy woman who has the uncanny ability to imitate singers like Shirley Bassey, Marilyn Monroe, and Judy Garland. Jane does all her own singing in the movie and she’s amazing beyond description. Brenda Blethyn plays Mari, LV’s overbearing mother; and Michael Caine is the talent agent who’s dating Mari and discovers LV’s talent. Both Brenda and Michael are also superb in their roles. I can’t remember the number of times I’ve seen the movie but I can watch it over and over again. I recommend it to anyone who’s looking for something different to watch. It’s a fabulous movie that’ll put a lift in your spirit and just let you forget about your cares and woes.

Right now I don’t really have any woes; things have been going fine. Dolly still isn’t in school but Kara and I got a lot done today and will get more done Wednesday after all the boys are back to school. We’ll get this place ship-shape in no time. Plus, and I already mentioned this, Joe is coming over to visit tomorrow. That sounds so nice, doesn’t it? “Joe is coming over to visit tomorrow.” No planes, trains, or buses needed. He lives about 50 minutes away now and can come to visit whenever he wants. He visited me in MO back in March; it was the first time I’d seen him in almost five years. Now, though, my best guy friend is only a stone’s throw away. That’s too cool!

He was here on the 15th to help me unload the moving truck, and I haven’t seen him since, other than on Skype. But it’s okay because I know I won’t have to wait another five years in between visits. It’s only been just over two weeks so I can’t complain. I just wish I was still closer to Ellen. It would be nice to see her occasionally too. I guess this is the way it has to be, though. At least she’s not a two-day drive away like she was when I lived in MO; she’s only about six hours away now. That’s close; but not close enough. Maybe someday, when I get my BIG money, I can buy my own town and have all my friends living there close together. We’ll form our own little community and we’ll all be able to see each other whenever we want.

It’s a nice dream and there are towns for sale; just Google and you’ll see. I don’t see anything wrong with wanting my own town and having all my special friends living there with me. I can bring them in from MO, MD and NY. I might even bring CAPA there at some point. How nice it would be. Perhaps I’ll just go to bed and dream up a name for my new town; and I’m so relaxed it might just happen.

Until next time…peace to all.