Fun Phone Calls

I was supposed to get a child support payment last night but it wasn’t in my account this morning. It really ticked me off since I’ve got things to do with that money. I called the Missouri Child Support Enforcement number this morning, something I’ve done dozens upon dozens of times to change my address and check on the payment. The girl I spoke to wasn’t very pleasant, I must say. Maybe it was because I called as soon as the office was open for calls. It’s an 866 number and they begin taking calls right at 7:00 in the morning. I called at 7:00:01 so I’m pretty sure she wasn’t ready to be dealing with me, and I was the pleasant one on the phone.

She took the information to change my address and phone number but when I asked her where my payment was all she said was that it was currently being processed so she couldn’t tell me exactly where it was. I could only assume that it would be disbursed to me today so I’ll have it for tomorrow. I really wanted to ask her why they have no way of knowing when my money will be released to me. I don’t really think it’s fair that the State can release my money when it feels good and ready yet the employees get paid on a regular basis.

Perhaps once a month the paychecks for the people who create the system of payment disbursement should be late and doled out randomly so the employees will know what it feels like for the rest of us. When their money is late and they have bills to pay, they’ll understand that this system they have going isn’t all it’s cracked up to be and they’ll change things a bit so that we custodial parents get our money one a regular basis rather then whenever the State decides to release it. I doubt it’ll happen but it would really be nice.

Later in the morning Kara was on the phone with the NYS DMV to get information for the both of us. She needs to get her address changed on her license and registration; and I need to get a NYS license as well as get my van tagged. The line was busy for a while and when it finally rang it was the usual automated crap asking her to push every number possible just to get the info we need. Then she was put on hold waiting for the next customer service representative. She’d asked me if criminals were the ones answering the phones these days. I believe they are but couldn’t confirm it with any conviction (no pun intended). She was getting tired of being on hold and said, “It was never like this. It used to be that you called and immediately got a criminal.” I know it doesn’t sound funny like this but if you’d been sitting here you’d have laughed as hard as I did.

The guy who finally answered the call was really nice and fun to talk to; even though Kara was doing all the talking I could tell the conversation was fun. I was even laughing at some points just from what she was saying to the guy. At one point she muted the phone and asked me if she should ask him if he gets conjugal visits. (More laughter.) She was busy writing down the info we needed and, at one point, he told her he’d transfer her to another department to change her address over the phone. She asked if she’d get disconnected or be put on hold for a long time. Then it was my turn to chime in. I quietly told her that all he had to do was hand the phone to the guy on the top bunk. She couldn’t stop laughing then. Yes, we were having a bit of fun, but the guy never had a clue; and don’t tell me you’ve never done it because I know you have.

Anyway, we got all the info we needed and found out that I can get my license changed immediately but can wait until my MO registration expires before I have to change it. They’d prefer I do it sooner but since I don’t have the funds right now waiting is an option and I won’t get into any trouble for it. That was good to know. I do have to get my license changed, though, because I can’t even open a bank account here in NY without a NYS picture ID. What the fuck is that all about? I got one in MD just by Ellen giving me a letter that said I was living in her house. Over here they won’t accept a letter because, “Anyone can give you a letter.” Guess what!! I’m not anyone.

So one of the things we have to do over the next couple of days is get my license changed back to a NY license and what’s really funny is that the DMV doesn’t require proof of address; just proof of identity. That makes no sense to me at all. A government agency doesn’t care where I live as long as I am who I say I am, yet a bank requires me to prove I live here. That’s as ass-backwards as anything can be. Whatever. I’ll get the license and will then get the bank account. It is what it is and there’s nothing I can do about it. So be it. Just thought I’d fill you in on the nonsense I had to deal with today. I’m sure there’s more to come so I’ll be prepared for it when it happens; as prepared as I can be, anyway.

Until next time…peace to all.