No Sadness Here

My brain is fried today. I spent a good portion of the early afternoon on the phone trying to get the cheapest car insurance possible. I got nothing decent as far as quotes are concerned so I’m stuck paying a butt-load for car insurance here in NY; one of the reasons being because my ex fucked up my credit while we were married. It sucks but I learned a lesson from it and will never make the mistake of sharing finances with anyone again. All the disappointing phones calls, however, have toasted my brain for the day and made me a bit sad.

I thought I’d figured out how to handle the brain overload and sadness by sipping a cocktail, talking to Kara, and just relaxing. Then I found out about a method that I think might work for me next time; the method creator told me how it works. This is what happened, but I have to backtrack a little. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t. Ellen, I think you’ll like this; maybe you could try it next time you’re sad.

Earlier today I’d been outside with Dolly who wanted to dig for a little while. She found a mound of dirt where a tree had been removed and went to town. She dug up some dirt and put it in a plastic box which I said she could bring in the house as long as the dirt didn’t get spilled everywhere. She agreed and she did a great job keeping things neat. She played quietly while I made my phone calls to those nasty old insurance companies and fell into my funk.

After I resigned myself to the fact that I’m stuck with these outrageous costs, I went upstairs to try to become happy again. Dolly wanted to stay downstairs to play and watch TV. Cool. Ty and Kara’s older son returned from school and started homework. That’s when it happened; unbeknownst to me Dolly had created her own method to cure sadness and I was going to learn all about it. Ty came upstairs from getting a pencil in his room and unhappily announced that, “Collette poured dirt all over our bedroom floor and all in Zach’s bed.” I was not prepared for what I was about to see.

I came downstairs to find a circle of dirt on the boys’ bedroom carpet, and a larger circle of dirt in Zach’s bed. I was ready to explode. Ty asked Kara for a vacuum cleaner for me to clean up the mess. Dolly was told to pick up her toys and go in my room to wait for me. I vacuumed up the dirt from the floor and the bed, then called her over to talk with me. When I asked her why she poured the dirt all over she quietly said, “You’ll get mad at me.” I asked her to tell me so she said, “I did it to Ty’s bed, too.” Ty’s bed is the top bunk. Imagine the fun I had cleaning up all the dirt up there.

Wait, it gets better. As I went to plug out the vacuum for the second time something caught my vision out of the corner of my eye. She’d poured it all over the top of one of their toy boxes, too. I made her tell me where else she’d poured dirt to which she replied, “That’s it, I didn’t do any more.” That’s it? That was more than enough: the floor, two beds and a toy box. So the mess was cleaned and she and I had a chat. I asked her why she poured the dirt all over her brothers’ stuff and she said, “Because I was sad and I wanted you.” She was sad and she wanted me downstairs with her. Did you get that?

So I repeated to her what she’d said then I asked, “And you thought pouring the dirt would make you happy and get me downstairs with you?” “Yes.” She was half right; I did go downstairs with her, but she wasn’t happy, not until a little while later, anyway. When recounting what she’d done, she was as chipper as Jiminy Cricket. I guess the dirt pouring method worked for her. I found a different method to lift my mood.

I went outside by myself and sat in my car for a while to get some peace and quiet. While I was there I started thinking funny thoughts: conversations I’d had with Joe about the lady with the happy couch ass, and my flippers; conversations I’d had with Ellen about Yummy Boy; and conversations I’d had with Kara over how to spell “ptooiey”, as well as other funny thoughts that were popping into my head. Before I left the car I was laughing until I was crying. Then I thought about Dolly’s method to lift sadness and I laughed even harder. She’d told me that the idea “just came into my head and I did it.” She was happy; maybe she’s onto something.

Maybe I should try that occasionally; let an idea just pop into my head and then run with it. Perhaps we should all try it once in a while. This method could work in all aspects of our lives. Sick of your job and want to quit, do it. Feel like buying that sweater you just saw at the mall, go for it. I mean, seriously, what would be wrong with that? As long as what we want to do isn’t illegal, it’s worth a try, right? If I’m in a bad mood and I feel like squeezing a loaf of bread just for the heck of it, I don’t see any harm in that. If I’m in a good mood and feel like wearing my clothing backwards for the day, who is it hurting? Get my drift? Maybe if we adults were as spontaneous as children our lives would be better. Maybe if we adults acted like children once in a while we’d be in better moods more often. Who knows; the next time I’m in a cranky mood I just might come to your house and pour dirt in your bed. It might make me feel better, and if you’re a good sport, it might make you feel better too. If not, I’ll make sure I’m wearing my sneakers so I can run away really quickly. You’ll be laughing about it later. I definitely know I will.

Until next time…peace to all.