Am I the Only Logical One?

I’ve got two subjects I really want to discuss tonight; both of them have been on my mind for a couple of days. I think what I’ll do is discuss the one that’s more imminent right now and I’ll bring up the other one tomorrow.

Back on September 2^nd I told you about a kid in my neighborhood that’s a huge bully. That was my “A Bully Diffused?” post. He hasn’t yet been diffused but I’m hoping he will be by the end of next week. I told you I’d emailed the property manager informing her of what happened with Zach and the bully, D, and that I’d sent her the police report number. I also emailed Zach’s teacher to let her know what happened. During that same week I called the property manager who didn’t call me back; and I spoke with the school counselor and the principal who have both spoken to D but can’t really do much for me here at home.

Yesterday Paul actually tried to pick a fight with me over this kid. He was outside with our kids when D kept bothering them. He came in ranting to me about how something needs to be done and that he’s about to give the kid an ass beatin’. I told him he’ll do no such thing considering the fact that he’s not even supposed to be here and could risk getting me evicted. He went on bitching and moaning about D and how he treats the kids around here saying that his parents don’t bother raising their kid properly. I know that; I live here; I see what’s going on.

What really bugged me, though, is that Paul, while he was busying trying to pick this fight, was occasionally throwing in racial slurs. That really bugged me and I actually stopped him at one point and told him that I don’t allow racism in my home. I told him he needed to shut up with his racist comments – I never knew he was such a bigot, believe it or not – because I raised our kids to understand that people are people regardless of race, creed, sex or anything else. He didn’t like it but he quit using the ugly words.

Then he started with his bullshit again about how he was going to give Zach permission to beat the crap out of D the next time D put his hands on Zach. By ‘putting hands on’ Paul was referring to D grabbing Zach’s shoulder as he walked away from D. Yes, that is considered touching another person but it isn’t violent. I told him he was going to tell Zach no such thing and that he was going to continue to let me handle the issue. I repeated to him that he’s not even supposed to be here and that he’s going to lay low with my neighbors. So then he said that, when he does move into his own place, he’s going to tell Zach that he then has the permission to beat the crap out of D. It took everything in me not to tell him what an idiot I think he is.

He seems to think that spending six weeks with his kids gives him the right to step in and trample all over my beliefs and my values; and to completely reverse what I’ve taught our kids. On a quick sidebar, that sentence right there is the topic of the other post I wanted to make tonight so if you read tomorrow’s post you’ll put them together. Anyway, I just told Paul he’ll have to do what he feels the need to do and I dropped the subject.

What he and a couple of other people don’t understand is that I have to go through all the proper channels to report this and to have the authorities try to handle it first. I’ve contacted the property manager, I spoke with school officials, and I filed a police report. I have one more step to cover, and tonight I put it in motion. I had to contact the property manager again today because D’s dad came out of his house and was screaming at my next-door-neighbor’s daughter, who’s 20, because she’d asked a friend of his last night to lower the music he was blasting from his car.

For the past few nights D’s parents and their friends have been hanging out on their stoop with Rap and Hip Hop music pounding from the friend’s car, with the headlights pointing right into the front doors of my neighbor and me. All the daughter had done was to ask them to turn down the music because she had to get up early for work. Today, D’s father stood in the parking lot screaming at the daughter telling her it was none of her f*ing business what they did; that they’d lived there for four years and could do what they wanted, blah, blah, blah. He screamed at her in front of all the rest of us and all the kids that were playing outside, mine included. Now, I’ve cursed in front of my kids but I don’t punctuate every sentence with half a dozen “mother fucker”s like this dude was doing.

When he was finished I emailed the property manager again because I couldn’t get through to her voice mail. The office closed today at 3:00 and it was about 4:45 when I emailed her. About 5:00 she called me and apologized for not getting back to me sooner; they’ve been having problems with their phones and computer systems but she said she’d definitely address my issue on Monday. That was fine with me. Perhaps we’ll get some resolution for the problem, and it’ll be the final step I’ll have to take in the chain of reports.

After I speak with her on Monday I’ll see what options I have but I will definitely tell her and the police officers that are assigned to our community that if something isn’t done about this family I will absolutely give my son permission to defend himself and his sister against D. After I’ve gone through all the steps I need to take and ensure that I’ve reported the problem to anyone and everyone that can work with me to solve the problem I feel that my kids will then have the right to do what’s necessary to get the bully off their backs. It just seems that I’m the only one who understands that.

A couple of people besides Paul have also said that Zach should just punch D in the face. They don’t understand that if my kid is the one to always come out swinging I’m the one who’s going to get in trouble. After I’ve spoken to everyone I need to, however, nobody will be able to say anything to me if my son has to take matters into his own hands. I just wish there was some way to inject that logic into everyone else. But I guess it’s just not that easy, especially for Paul or he wouldn’t have gotten into so much trouble for being violent.

It is what it is, though, and I’m just going to do what I believe is the right. Come Monday I will have exhausted all my options and will take it from there. With luck management will be able to do something about it and my neighbors, my kids, and I won’t have to be bothered anymore. If not…well, let’s just wait and see. I’ll keep you posted as more details arise. In the meantime, please send positive vibes, prayers, or whatever it is that you send, to Paul so he’ll be able to learn that he needs to become a better person and father. Thanks.

Until next time…peace to all.