PMS or Just Really Cranky?

I said at the end of last night’s blog that I would probably have some interesting stuff to report on tonight. I hope nobody was biting their nails waiting because my day wasn’t as eventful as I thought it was going to be. It started off that way and I got 1 ½ errands done when I just got so ticked off that I had to come back home and postpone the rest of the day’s events until tomorrow. I wasn’t ticked off at anything in particular, I don’t think; it was just a mixture of basic crap that kept building and festering. I’ll explain more about that if tomorrow goes the way I’d like. If not, it’ll just have to wait. There’s a reason and you’ll understand why I’m waiting when I actually post about it.

Anyway, I don’t know if it was all the crap that was happening that got me cranky or if it’s PMS that got me cranky. See, I’ve never had PMS in my life – until now, I think. When I was younger, nobody even knew I had IT unless I told them; there was never any change in my mood or anything else. My visits just came and went; and while I had friends who constantly complained about IT, I didn’t because, rationally speaking, if I didn’t get IT, I wouldn’t have my three beautiful children. It’s a fact of life, ladies; deal with IT. I know it’s hard sometimes, but think of what you’d be missing if you never had IT.

I’ve been noticing changes lately, though, that I asked my doctor about the last time I visited – when I went for my ‘Well Woman Exam.’ What the fuck is that about…the ‘Well Woman Exam’? Who came up with that politically correct expression? I used to go the gynecologist for a check-up; now I go for a ‘Well Woman Exam.’ Holy shit!! If I’ve got a problem in that area do I go for a ‘Not-so-Well Woman Exam’? Call it what you like; we all know what it entails. “That which we call a rose by any other name…” right ladies?

Anyway, when I asked the doctor if I might be going through the early stages of menopause – the name given it is perimenopause – he said, given my age, it’s possible. He also said he doesn’t like the fact that someone actually came up with the name ‘perimenopause’ because there really isn’t such a thing; that a woman’s body just continues to change until she’s actually in menopause (when IT finally stops for good). He’s only been practicing for a little over a year, though, so maybe he isn’t hip to all the old lady lingo yet. I explained that my cycle hasn’t been the same since I had Dolly four years ago, that I’ve suddenly got acne (I’m almost 43 and I keep getting huge zits.), and that I’ve noticed that I’ve started getting really cranky around “that time.” When I say ‘cranky’ I don’t mean, “Gosh, it’s hot, my kids are noisy, and I’m feeling a bit out of sorts.” When I say ‘cranky’ I mean, “I HATE BEING HERE AND IF ANY OF MY FUCKED-IN-THE-HEAD NEIGHBORS EVEN LOOKS AT ME I’M GOING TO BEAT SOME ASS JUST BECAUSE I CAN!!!” (No, Ginger, I don’t mean you. You know of those to whom I refer.) Any little thing can and will set me off and, once I’m in a crank-ass mood, I’m not coming out of it – you can’t make me, so don’t even try.

That is PMS, right? That’s what I was always told by my friends who claim to have it. Quite honestly I think PMS is just an excuse for women to act like bitches and get away with it. Are there physical and hormonal changes that occur? Yes, absolutely; I’ve never denied that and now I can personally attest to it. However, if you know the problem exists, you can absolutely control it. I do. I was in a severely cranky mood today after a few things didn’t go as planned so I just came back home, sat on the sofa, and didn’t move all day. Did anyone get hurt in the process? Nope; that’s the point. Get it? Had I stayed out and continued to try to run my errands, I may have snapped on some unsuspecting shithead who probably would’ve earned a bitch-out but not the ass-chewing I would’ve given in my current state of mind. See, PMS can be controlled; there is absolutely no reason to stand with a big grin on your face while you pleasantly talk about all the times you belittled and abused your significant other simply because you feel you’ve got the ultimate feminine excuse. It’s bullshit and you know it.

Am I still cranky right now? Yea, I am; but writing about it is helping to calm me down a bit. I also want to go to sleep but my kids haven’t yet gone to sleep so I can’t go just yet. Maybe I’ll just keep writing until I fall asleep at my desk and my readers have three days worth of reading in this one post. That wouldn’t be nice of me though, to keep writing for no reason. I’m not that type of person, and I’m not going to take my PMS, if that’s what it is, out on you folks. I am going to wrap it up though, then proof read, grammar and spell check, then copy and paste into my blog. I always write in Word first; it’s just easier that way. In any case, I’ll be back tomorrow and, with luck, my day will have gone much better than today went. I’ll let you know.

Until next time…peace to all.