What Did I Say?

I was sitting here tonight trying to think of a topic for tonight’s blog and I couldn’t. I was doing anything and everything to avoid starting it, and then I realized I must have writer’s block. Oh, not another problem I have to deal with; I don’t want any more problems. I Googled the definition of ‘writer’s block’ to see what the symptoms are and I subsequently determined that I don’t have it. Basically, and without quoting any particular source, writer’s block is the inability of a writer to begin or continue a piece of work.

I’m disqualified from that since I have no problem continuing once I start, nor do I have a problem starting; my problem was trying to decide on a specific topic. Then I realized that if I would just start writing, I’d keep writing whether I wanted to or not. I can’t help it; my fingers just keep going and going and going…like that Energizer Bunny. Oooo, that’s freaky. If my fingers won’t stop, though, it’s because my mind won’t stop either. My fingers are speaking for my mind so they’re working together, I guess, to get my thoughts to the paper, screen, whatever it’s supposed to be called these days.

I just have so many thoughts lately that it’s hard to separate them into different topics or to find enough to write about any single one thought. For instance, I’ve already mentioned that I want to move to Maryland but can’t secure housing. That’s always on my mind but there isn’t anything I can do about it and nothing more I can say about it. What’s the point in writing about it again? There isn’t one but when I’m trying to think of a blog topic, that thought keeps butting in and won’t go away. I also really dislike doing laundry but there isn’t anyone else who can do it. The kids can do their own, technically, but not without help from me. See, end of topic. There isn’t anything else to say about the laundry in my house.

I really don’t like my neighbors; I’m tired of kids who don’t take responsibility for their own actions and try to blame my kids all the time for things my kids didn’t do; I really despise lying and disrespectfulness; I’m not losing weight fast enough which is my own fault; I’m tired of my sister treating my like I don’t matter; I want a small shrimp party platter but don’t have the money to get one right now; there’s nothing to watch on TV; and it’s really difficult to type when I have to keep dipping into the sunflower seed bowl and then remove the empty shell from my mouth. See what I mean? All of these thoughts running through my head tonight and none of them interesting or intricate enough to require its own blog space (if I haven’t already discussed it previously).

I wonder how writers, like columnists, actually come up with topics to write about every single day. My life isn’t that exciting or interesting, to me anyway, that the general public would tune in to see what’s up seven days a week. I don’t know; maybe it is to some, but those people aren’t commenting to let me know what they think. I know my topics aren’t always red hot but I’m also not a professional author/columnist/writer so I don’t have the skill and know-how that professionals do to keep the readers’ attention all the time. I don’t think I’m doing that bad though. As a 42-year-old, divorced mother of three who spends her days sitting at home, dealing with shitty neighbors, and snotty-ass neighborhood kids, and feels like she’s sinking deeper and deeper into the your-life-sucks-and-will-only-continue-to-get-worse well, I’d say I’m better than average with this blog.

I actually started it last year and didn’t really get that into it; basically because I kept forgetting I had started it. I wrote sometimes this year also but never really got into it until I quit smoking in front of everyone at the end of April. It was the only way I could actually force myself to quit, remember? It worked, I’ve quit smoking (hence the bowl of sunflower seeds) but don’t blog about that like I did when I first quit. There is only so much a person can write about the trials and tribulations of quitting tobacco. I had to start writing about other things just to keep myself interested in my blog. It’s a good thing I did too, or I’d have fallen asleep weeks ago.

Tomorrow I should have some really interesting stuff to write about since the kids and I have a bunch of stuff to do all day. It’ll be exciting for all of us and I’m sure I’ll be so full of anecdotes and jokes and stuff that I won’t know where to begin. If that happens I’ll just start a chapter blog – each night will be another part of the story that will keep my readers in suspense until the next night. Relax, I’m just kidding. We’ll be doing a lot of things, yes; just not enough to warrant that much blog time. Or will it…? I guess you’ll just have to come back and see.

Until next time…peace to all.