It's Too Late For This Tonight

Why is it that my kids only allow me to find out what their bad choices of the day were right when they’re supposed to be going to bed and I’m supposed to be sitting down to relax? Tonight I let the kids play outside extra long figuring they’d come in the house, get ready and go to bed, and fall asleep immediately. I was almost right; but I know, “almost” only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades – yeh, yeh, yeh. They did come in the house and get ready for bed, though; without any argument, either. That’s when I found out what two of them had done earlier in the day but hadn’t mentioned to me.

I walked into my room to change into the shorts and T-shirt I sleep in and noticed a bright pink, sticky-but-soft-to-the-touch substance on my carpet, on one of my window screens, and all over inside the bottom of the window frame. Knowing right away who the culprit was, I called Dolly into the room and asked her to identify the unknown substance. “It’s yogurt,” she almost whispered. Yogurt in the plastic tube that had been frozen when I’d given it to her was now smeared on my carpet and my window. Fuck!!! I came down here to the kitchen to get a rag. I wet it in hot water and returned to my bedroom. The yogurt didn’t come up as readily as I thought it might. Whatever came off on the first swipe needed to be plucked off the rag and thrown in the garbage, so I walked into the bathroom and turned on the hot sink tap while I pulled the sticky yogurt off the rag and threw the clumps in the garbage.

Then I tried to rinse the rag but noticed that the water level in the sink was rising and there were small, generic Fruit Loops floating in the water. Since all the kids were eating the cereal a couple of hours earlier, but only one had brought it upstairs, I called Ty into the bathroom to inquire as to why he’d thrown his cereal down the sink drain. His answer: “Because I forgot to throw it down the toilet.” He didn’t forget; he was warned that, if he was going to take the amount of cereal he took, he was going to eat all of it. If he’d thrown the balance in the toilet, there might still be pieces floating that I’d see and he’d be busted. However, since he decided to use the alternate method of disposal, he still got busted because he’s not privy to the fact that cereal clogs sink drains. Now, I didn’t let him know that I know why he poured it down the drain; it’s enough that I’m aware without making him feel worse about what he did.

Anyway, I came back downstairs to get my big jug of vinegar and a new box of baking soda to try to unclog the drain. The vinegar got all over my hand, and the sink was alive with the volcanic mixture bubbling through the nasty cereal clog in its way, yet the water still didn’t drain. Great; I was forced to wait until the water slowly drained out of the sink so I could do the mixture all over again without the water in the way. In the meantime, I still needed a way to get the yogurt off of my window. I sent Dolly down to the kitchen to get me my toughest cleaner and then again to get the paper towels. I sprayed the yogurt and tried to wipe but it wasn’t budging. So, I sent Dolly back down the stairs to get a butter knife so I could scrape up the gooey crap. That worked but it was still a pain in the ass. I scraped it all up then sprayed again and wiped with more paper towels. One mess down, another to go.

Back in the bathroom the sink still hadn’t drained so I plugged the overflow hole with a rag and tried to plunge it a bit. Lots of pressure but that friggin’ clog just wouldn’t move. So I decided to come back downstairs and figure out what to write for tonight’s blog. Since I couldn’t think of anything I read Tracy’s blog first. She’s having trouble at home and I feel really bad that I have no sound advice to offer her. I know things will get better for her; it’s just tough seeing my friends going through rough times. When I finished reading and commenting on hers, I started mine; and here we are. Right now I need to run back up to the bathroom to see if the sink is completely drained – it only started an hour-and-a-half ago. Let’s take a look, shall we?

Okay, fifteen minutes later I’m back. I went upstairs to check the sink, which was completely drained. So I poured the rest of the box of baking soda down the drain and another quart, or so, of vinegar behind it. My sink was bubbling and hissing and doing whatever it was supposed to be doing to get rid of the nasty clog. I watched it for a while and it was quite mesmerizing, I must say. There was a puddle of the vinegar in the sink, since it won’t drain yet, that reminded me of a puddle outside when there is a really light rain; I can sometimes see little bubbles rising to the top, almost like fish bubbles in a pond. This wasn’t fish or rain, though; it was the baking soda that had lightly dispersed in the sink. From the drain hole, though, there was a steady stream of thousands of tiny bubbles all rising to the top just chugging away at the clog down in the depths of the drain. Occasionally there was a really big air bubble that would glug-glug its way to the top. Cool. That tells me the mixture is working and getting beyond the clog to allow that air to escape.

I don’t know yet if it will completely work, but when I go upstairs to get ready for bed, I’ll pour some boiling water down the drain (I’ll boil a kettle before I go up there) to finish the unclogging process. I just shouldn’t have to be doing this right now. I should be relaxing and blogging and deciding what I’ll be doing tomorrow rather than reminding myself to boil a kettle of water before I go to bed. Can it wait until tomorrow morning? Sure it can, but if the kids get up before I do and use the sink, everything I’ve done so far tonight will have been in vain. It has to be finished tonight, and I have to hope that it will work; the clog seemed really tough. If the baking soda/vinegar method doesn’t work, tomorrow I’ll take a walk up to Quik Trip to get a can of coke; if it can clean rust off of metal, it’ll definitely unclog a drain. Besides, I’ve used it before so I know it works; and it’s cheaper than drain cleaner.

I just wish my kids would let me know what they’ve done before the day is over so I don’t have to be here, at 11:30 at night, undoing whatever it is that they’ve done. Then again, if Dolly and Ty hadn’t done what they did tonight, I wouldn’t have this as my blog topic and I’d be sitting here telling you about the tattoos I’ve got and the tattoos that I still want to get. Now that would be interesting, right? “Yes, Beth, it would be about as interesting as your step-by-step house-cleaning process.” See, I knew you’d like it; maybe I’ll discuss both tomorrow night – my tattoos and my house-cleaning methodology. Then again, maybe I’ll think of something else that will actually hold your attention.

Until next time…peace to all.